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**drlifeech** · 08-29-2012, 07:05 PM

So I'm 15. I have had a girlfriend I believe I am in love with. She's been wanting to have sex for awhile now and so do I. Although I keep trying not to give into the temptation of sexual plessure, its becomeing increasingly harder. Any advice on how I can control my sexual thoughts in a more mature way? Thank you

hi Eli

my advice is sexual intercourse, generally, results in love & attachment between two people. then if that relationship ends, for some reason, generally one of those people will experience strong suffering & heartbreak, even depression.

girls, in particular, can lose alot of self-esteem when they feel they have been sexually rejected after engaging in a sexual relationship. so, when a sexual relationship does not work out, girls can develop the tendency to keep pursing sexual relationships in an attempt to recover their lost self-esteem, which often increases (rather than improves) their self-esteem problems

what i am saying is, if we chose for ourself to be a Buddhist practitioner, we aim to act in ways that do not create harm & suffering in ourselves & others. so, from a Buddhist perspective, it is ideal to have a sexual relationships when one has some long term perspective on one's life & finds a suitable partner that shares the same long term perspective & life goals

with teenage girls that are pushy for sex, we can never know what is going on with their reproductive &/or filial (bonding) instincts. when you say: " I believe I am in love", are you prepared & committed in relation to any long term consequences that might arise?

from the viewpoint of Buddhist practise, if we are not committed to long term outcomes, we generally avoid sexual relationships

kind regards

element

(this song was a hit when i was 15 years old)

08-29-2012, 07:05 PM	#3
drlifeech Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 374 Senior Member	So I'm 15. I have had a girlfriend I believe I am in love with. She's been wanting to have sex for awhile now and so do I. Although I keep trying not to give into the temptation of sexual plessure, its becomeing increasingly harder. Any advice on how I can control my sexual thoughts in a more mature way? Thank you hi Eli my advice is sexual intercourse, generally, results in love & attachment between two people. then if that relationship ends, for some reason, generally one of those people will experience strong suffering & heartbreak, even depression. girls, in particular, can lose alot of self-esteem when they feel they have been sexually rejected after engaging in a sexual relationship. so, when a sexual relationship does not work out, girls can develop the tendency to keep pursing sexual relationships in an attempt to recover their lost self-esteem, which often increases (rather than improves) their self-esteem problems what i am saying is, if we chose for ourself to be a Buddhist practitioner, we aim to act in ways that do not create harm & suffering in ourselves & others. so, from a Buddhist perspective, it is ideal to have a sexual relationships when one has some long term perspective on one's life & finds a suitable partner that shares the same long term perspective & life goals with teenage girls that are pushy for sex, we can never know what is going on with their reproductive &/or filial (bonding) instincts. when you say: " I believe I am in love", are you prepared & committed in relation to any long term consequences that might arise? from the viewpoint of Buddhist practise, if we are not committed to long term outcomes, we generally avoid sexual relationships kind regards element (this song was a hit when i was 15 years old)
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