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**ligaliaCods** · 06-21-2011, 10:17 PM

Am I completely wrong about everything?

No.

One thing to be very cautious about is when people use Buddhism teachings to try to get you to put up with things that you shouldn't have to put up with. They might tell you to "let go" of your jealousy or anger or whatever emotion is arising, particularly if they see themselves as the target of your emotions. Don't allow other people to tell you what to feel or how to feel it. Buddhism, when used in this way, can be a tool used for purpose of trying to control relationships. Unfortunately, even very knowledgable "Buddhists" will sometime adopt this tactic of turning the tables and trying to make you feel like there's something wrong with you if you have a negative emotion associated with something they did. If that is happening, then recognize what is happening.

Pay attention to your feelings. There might be some very good reasons that these feelings are arising at this moment. Listen to them. You don't have to put them aside. Feelings come and go, and whatever feelings present themselves in this moment are subject to change.

The practice of Buddhism doesn't have to do with fixing other people. I hope things work out in a manner that benefits you along this path.

06-21-2011, 10:17 PM	#4
ligaliaCods Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 349 Senior Member	Am I completely wrong about everything? No. One thing to be very cautious about is when people use Buddhism teachings to try to get you to put up with things that you shouldn't have to put up with. They might tell you to "let go" of your jealousy or anger or whatever emotion is arising, particularly if they see themselves as the target of your emotions. Don't allow other people to tell you what to feel or how to feel it. Buddhism, when used in this way, can be a tool used for purpose of trying to control relationships. Unfortunately, even very knowledgable "Buddhists" will sometime adopt this tactic of turning the tables and trying to make you feel like there's something wrong with you if you have a negative emotion associated with something they did. If that is happening, then recognize what is happening. Pay attention to your feelings. There might be some very good reasons that these feelings are arising at this moment. Listen to them. You don't have to put them aside. Feelings come and go, and whatever feelings present themselves in this moment are subject to change. The practice of Buddhism doesn't have to do with fixing other people. I hope things work out in a manner that benefits you along this path.
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