[NofFoomiTot]

Spain has a well earned reputation of giving birth to fanatics. There was Torquemada, Millan Astray, and the lesser known Cinderella, our beloved forum poster. Many of you who happened to come across her may have thought she was the cleaning lady at the forum but she's in fact a poster. You don't see her often. She posts 99% of her thousand or so posts within the same few threads she has made that 97% of posters don't bother to read unless they like watching me make fun of someone for comic relief. She is, however, one of our own and as one of our I don't think she should be limited to just a few bat-shit crazy threads. I want her to expand her mind by taking in the aromas, sights, and sounds of ABF.

"But Anodyne," you say, "how do we draw out an obviously socially awkward and emotionally unstable woman from her comfort zone?"

With candy, of course. Unfortunately I ate all the candy.

The alternative to candy is to make her feel at home first. Gradually make her feel comfortable in a new environment. She looks all around ABF and it's just so new and shinny that she can't help but tremble. There is so much to take in. Learning the English language has brought her many gifts like not having to read subtitles or listen to crappy voice overs to American films but there is too much to take in all at one time. It's like a roller coaster ride for her and the roller coaster is named ABF.

Being the considerate person that I am I shall take it upon myself to make her feel at home. I just ask that none of the other posters startle her by asking uncomfortable questions, such as "Who are you? You post here? Huh... I thought you were Sean's girlfriend. That's what he kept telling us" or "hey, miss... you need to stop shouting like a lunatic. Our own lunatics here don't shout and so please follow their example. Hmm.... didn't you get banned? Okay, honey... lets see some ID." Now you all know who she is and so there is no excuse for similar awkward moments.

So now I can make Cinderella comfortable. My early attempts involving poking her with a stick to get her out more and enjoy the forum was poorly thought out. I have found a better way to socialize Cinderella with normal people, not unlike like yourselves.

The question on the tip of everyone's tongue now is how are you going to do it, Anodyne?!

Well, what makes Cinderella comfortable? Bold letters made large and underlined. Absurd claims made that she has no evidence for. Repeating those same absurd claims weeks after they were shown to be absurd as if nothing had ever happened. Silly ways of expressing herself that can't be completely blamed on her translating her thoughts directly from Catalan to English. The cherry on top is a fanatical style that makes all the ladies in the psych ward go ga-ga for Cinder!

So on to my goal of drawing her out of a self imposed seclusion in a few theads.

Okay... something that she is familiar with... what would that be? Ah, an absurd claim that can't be supported.

In Barcelona, the 99% of jailed people is foreigner... including Spanish! Who are you going to fool? Catalan is not heard in prisons... I think that Catalonia of the thirties was a peaceful place...

Check.

Now make her feel comfortable by discussing the subject with her but in a way that would put her at ease. I must draw from previous experiences. It has to be done right or she'll never come out.

Breathe in.... breathe out....



You say dumb thing. 99% of of jailed people in Barcelona is foreigner? Ha!


You show how you know! You know pull my leg. It sad story