[F1grandprix]

I would, literally, have paid to see that. [rofl]

Now, a recounting of idiocy.

A gentleman dropped off a laptop, about 4 years old with a load of virus infections. After the basic clean up was done I noted his Norton Antivirus was out of date, to put it mildly. It was the 2006 version that had expired in 2007. Virus defenitions were 3 years old so I did the sensible thing, I uninstalled it and loaded Microsoft Security Essentials so at least he had some protection. Note that we also sell Norton at work for about £19.

Me: "OK sir, infections have been cleaned, mostly basic malware. I've removed your expired Norton installation and loaded a free Anti-Virus to cover the system for the time being."

Customer: "What? What did you do to my Norton?"

Me: "We uninstalled it since it had expired."

Customer: "I paid for that! Why would you uninstall it?"

Me: "Well sir it was 3 years out of date with virus deffenitions, antivirus that out of date is basically useless. We've loaded you on a free antivirus in the meantime and we also sell the 2010 version of Norton."

Customer: "That's ridiculous! I paid £40 for that norton! How dare you uninstall it! What's going to stop virus's getting on my PC now?!"

Me: "As I said sir, we've loaded a program called Microsoft Security Essentials. I use it myself and it's a perfectly effective antivirus. If you prefer I can remove that and load the latest Norton for you."

Customer: "That's not the point! I already paid £40 for the norton that was on there!"

Me: "Sorry, perhaps I'm misunderstanding. Have you renewed your subscription with Norton for this year? Or did you pay £40 back in 2006 when you bought the laptop?"

Customer: "I bought it with the PC and I'm paying you rip-off merchants for something I already paid for!"

Me: "Sir, you have to renew a subscription to Norton every 12 months."

Customer: "No you don't! My friend told me you buy it and that's it! Don't try to trick me! I build computers! Anyway, what's this Microsoft Essential crap? Never heard of it! My friend says Norton is the best, that's what was on my PC and that's what I want on it!"

Me: "OK, sir, these are the options you have: I've uninstalled the expired norton, regardless of what you may have been told a 3 year old, non-updated version of any antivirus is about as effective as a tissue paper condom. This is evidenced by the fact that your PC was full of Trojans. So: 1: I have already loaded a free antivirus aswell as some free malware removal tools for you, they should be sufficient to keep your PC clean. You can take it away as it is. However if you insist, 2: I can load the latest version of Norton which has a 12 month subscription and will cost an additional £19."

Customer: "BUT I'VE ALREADY PAID FOR NORTON!"

It took the director stepping in and explaining in serveral different ways that antivirus programs like norton are a yearly-sub and finally a call to his friend who told him the same thing before he finally twigged. It was funny hearing him go "but... but... yeah but you told me... no you deffinately told me it was.... *shuffles out of sight*" whilst on the phone. [rofl]