[illilmicy]

I finally got in touch with a lawyer from that peanut-looking country, and he has confirmed what I have read about naturalisation.

In brief: the procedure mostly concerns going to Paraguay to get permanent residency, or more specifically, a cedula. Then, I sit on the darn thing for three years, though the guy says that it is helpful to spend a little bit of the 3yr there, or at least in the neighbourhood. After the time has passed, I get to apply for citizenship. Because Paraguay is poorer than its neighbours, most of them are trying to get out instead of in, so they do not have problems with anchor babies and the like. However, a facilitator with connections would be most helpful to ensure that this process proceeds smoothly.

I am exploring options to make it appear that I've stuck around. What I might do is 'visit' Argentina with my luggage and fly back to Ah'murrakuh from there...every little manoeuvre helps.

I estimate that the first two trips (one to apply, then one to get the cedula) will cost $12k including ancillary expenses, so I am doing further due diligence, including contacting a second lawyer to verify the procedure, and will start getting the requisite documents processed around March so that I may go down in the summer (their winter). Note that the sum includes $5k to be deposited down there to demonstrate financial wherewithal.

Fun things to do with a Paraguay passport:
-open foreign accounts
-get an international driver's license
-get benefits usually reserved for illegals (Soy paraguayo, señor. Miira mi pasaporte.)
-travel to Persia or Cuba without getting harassed (further) by yanquis
-mark 'Hispanic / Latino' and receive affirmative action. I suggest gringos stand in the sun for 30min before attempting this.
-When going overseas, no more embarrassing stigma of being American.