[DariushPetresku]

One of my favourite rants of all time:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=blppKS-nz9g

Parking and driving and shopping and eating and working. Somewhere, somehow, they all got chewed and spit back out. And they don’t taste like living anymore. Don’t you see what it’s like in this deranged wearing, blender of a world? Every day is an agonizing ordeal, like balancing a pot of scolding water on your head While people whip your legs and but. (Ah, you never forget your senior prom) You think I am sick? Well the only disease I’ve got is modern life-- A schnug- busting gauntlet of inefficiency and misery that’s one long parade of let downs, put downs, trickle downs, shutouts, freeze-outs, sellouts, numb-nuts, nincompoops and nimrods all making every day as much fun as waxing a flaming Pontiac with your tongue. Or even if you do luck into the possibility of some fleeting pleasure, like say if some nymphomaniac telephone operators with the muscle control of Romanian mat slapper agree to a little strip air hockey, it will be over before it starts, cause some foul-lacking, feather-reeking cab jockey slams his checker up your hatchback; and the cab is owned some piniata spanker from a Santa Ria cult in Wakampa who starts shaking chicken bones at you and gives you a boil on your neck so big, all it need is Michael Jordan’s autograph to make it complete. And even with all this, WITH ALL THIS, I still drag my sorry but off the ceiling every morning and stick my face in the raping machine for one more day knowing when its time to flash the cosmic car keys at those pearly gates, I won’t be in the coffin anyway because some underhanded undertaker sold my heart, pancreas, and other assorted good ’n plenty to that same Santé Ria Cult!! So does anybody really wonder why anybody is hanging onto sanity by the atoms on the tips of their fingernails while life dirty dances on their digits?? And is it any wonder that I seemed deranged??