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-   -   I'm mentally ill and I want to be institutionalized (http://www.discussworldissues.com/forums/showthread.php?t=82364)

Jadldqys 01-04-2012 08:00 AM

I'm mentally ill and I want to be institutionalized
 
I have fibromyalgia, myofascial pain syndrome, chronic fatigue syndrome, insomnia (possibly mild narcolepsy), high anxiety levels, panic attacks. I also had cyclothymia, which developed into bipolar disorder type 2 after a recent lay off (my first extremely traumatic event in life - served as a trigger to worsen my bipolar disorder). Right now I am medicated with anti-epileptic drugs such Lamictal, Lyrica, and other drugs - Xanax, baclofen, OxyContin. They work exceptionally well for my illnesses. The only complaint I have is my chronic fatigue, which will be soon addressed by a sleep specialist after a sleep study (a stimulant is likely to be prescribed). Since I don't have a job and I am only 24 - I get to use my parents' insurance until I am 26 in the USA. I am scared as hell that I won't find a job with a good insurance policy and won't be able to afford my drugs. I have a severe issue with tricyclic anti-depressants and typical/atypical antipsychotics - they turn me into a zombie and I logically think "living like this is not worth it". I become suicidal on those drugs, which is why I am not using them. However, I think those drugs are waaay cheaper and are likely to be used in a mental institution instead of the drugs I currently use. So, what will happen to me when I turn 26 and have no insurance and no money? Can I be institutionalized somewhere for free and be medicated with the drugs I currently use? I don't want my bipolar type disorder 2 to turn into type 1 and go on a rampage! At the same time if I were to be given those typical/atypical antipsychotics - I would undeniably find a way to end my life as I would not consider that to be life... Maybe I can seek...ehm...mental asylum in other countries like Canada?

http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...ilies/cry1.gifhttp://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...ilies/cry1.gifhttp://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...ilies/cry1.gif

EDIT: I finally saw a real psychiatrist (first time ever), who simply added Nuvigil to my list of medications and it really made a positive difference. I was tired of feeling tired before and wanted to just let go/give up and have someone take care of me (desire to "be institutionalized"...). I now can stay awake and my fatigue is greatly reduced to a point where I began being interested in outside activities, physical activities, sex with women instead of masturbation, etc... I was tired too much for any of those activities, but not anymore! At first I thought Nuvigil made me hypomanic again, but it leveled off to where I am stable but alert. I have nothing to complain about anymore. It sucks that I can't get excited/fascinated, because, in my case, it triggers hypomania and then I get severe depression later. Now I am just stable, like this - http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...ies/smile1.gif, but not like this - [thumbup], http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...es/tongue1.gif, [rofl], http://www.discussworldissues.com/fo...s/excited1.gif.

WapSaibian 01-04-2012 08:14 AM

It sounds to me like what you have is Lyme Disease - which is misdiagnosed all the time as fibromyalgia/cfs/everything you just described and leads to a chronic lyme disease condition if it is not caught soon enough. The only exstensive test that can truly verify you arent lyme positive is one that tests all bands of blood for lyme.

You need to send your blood off to a lab such as Igenics which tests all bands for lyme disease - whereas most clinical tests do not.

Please take my advice into consideration as someone close to me suffered those exact same symptoms and though they are not completely well; the symptoms have resided enough through oral antibiatocs that their life is not utterly and purely miserable. Though the condition remains - if it is indeed lymedisease which you suffer and caught early enough you wont have to suffer the steep price of paying for IV antibiotics to get well.

Please please please consider my advice and good luck.

http://igenex.com/Website/

Also, a a trailer for a documentary about Lyme Disease which chronicles many of the symptoms you described (believe its on netflix if you happen to have it)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxWgS0XLVqw

Hetgvwic 01-04-2012 08:27 AM

Quote:

It sounds to me like what you have is Lyme Disease - which is misdiagnosed all the time as fibromyalgia/cfs/everything you just described and leads to a chronic lyme disease condition if it is not caught soon enough. The only exstensive test that can truly verify you arent lyme positive is one that tests all bands of blood for lyme.

You need to send your blood off to a lab such as Igenics which tests all bands for lyme disease - whereas most clinical tests do not.

Please take my advice into consideration as someone close to me suffered those exact same symptoms and though they are not completely well; the symptoms have resided enough through oral antibiatocs that their life is not utterly and purely miserable. Though the condition remains - if it is indeed lymedisease which you suffer and caught early enough you wont have to suffer the steep price of paying for IV antibiotics to get well.

Please please please consider my advice and good luck.

http://igenex.com/Website/

Also, a a trailer for a documentary about Lyme Disease which chronicles many of the symptoms you described (believe its on netflix if you happen to have it)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxWgS0XLVqw
Thank you for advice, but Lyme Disease has been ruled out long ago. It did cross my one doctor's mind because I had eczema and he wanted to be sure it was not Lyme Disease rash. In addition, the location of my residency and childhood history make it extremely unlikely. I had an accident when I was 5, which started development of trigger points and improper posture and muscle overuse further developed trigger point formation (developed into myofascial pain syndrome). When I was a teenager I suffered from MDD, which made my body hurt when I cried and fibromyalgia developed. I also have 4 pinched nerves in my neck and spine.

videolkif 01-04-2012 08:42 AM

If you are certain then so be it.

I do hope you find the help you need - but just to note.. they ruled out lyme disease off the bat in the instance i recalled also; and it took 6 years for a knowledgable dr. to reccomend a test that tested the entire spectrum of blood for lyme. Thats when the results came back positive. Whatever the case, please get help - no matter what the pain dont make suicide your option. Again good luck in finding the help you need.

QRhnNSg9 01-04-2012 08:50 AM

This post is so beta.

GAGNAPPEAPH 01-04-2012 09:00 AM

Quote:

This post is so beta.
[beta]

wmirkru 01-04-2012 09:31 AM

Sounds like you should watch this :

http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/marke...we-all-insane/

You seem to enjoy labelling your illnesses etc. Maybe you would enjoy that video...

The reason you have "chronic fatigue syndrome" is probably because of the large amount of sedative meds you take?!

rammossyAcron 01-04-2012 09:36 AM

Quote:

Sounds like you should watch this :

http://topdocumentaryfilms.com/marke...we-all-insane/

You seem to enjoy labelling your illnesses etc. Maybe you would enjoy that video...

The reason you have "chronic fatigue syndrome" is probably because of the large amount of sedative meds you take?!
Sedatives like Xanax and opiates like OxyContin actually reduced pain and thus improved the fatigue, which was present way before any drugs were used. But you are right, my medications may cause fatigue for some people, but not in my case.

Also, physicians labeled my diseases, not me. I was in denial for a long time... I was one of the people who thought pharmaceuticals were all about marketing until things got worse for me. I owe my stability to drugs.

Lapsiks 01-04-2012 09:41 AM

OP, where do you live?

Savviioor 01-04-2012 09:44 AM

Quote:

OP, where do you live?
South Carolina, USA

endulundaSauh 01-04-2012 09:54 AM

Quote:

South Carolina, USA
You shouldn't have told him, he's more polite when he's not sure of his personal safety.

RobertLS 01-04-2012 09:55 AM

Quote:

South Carolina, USA
Let me just say, your idea is just ridiculous. What you are looking for doesn't even exist. Who would pay for it anyway? It would certainly be government subsidized, as will most of your health care in the long run. It's so silly for you to think that you are so bad off that you should be put away for the rest of your life. You need to find new doctors, and stop finding reasons why you can't do something else. I work with people that say things like that all of the time, everything is "I can't because of xyz...". They get so wrapped up in their illnesses that they let it define them. Also, the people that argue against psych meds in general are ****ing nuts. I've seen completely psychotic people do a 180 thanks to them. You might want to look into an acute setting if you haven't yet, it might help you get some perspective.

AutoCadPhotoSHOP 01-04-2012 09:55 AM

Quote:

You shouldn't have told him, he's more polite when he's not sure of his personal safety.
LMAO!!! That video is so full of **** btw, please ignore it.

CFstantony 01-04-2012 10:23 AM

Quote:

Let me just say, your idea is just ridiculous. What you are looking for doesn't even exist. Who would pay for it anyway? It would certainly be government subsidized, as will most of your health care in the long run. It's so silly for you to think that you are so bad off that you should be put away for the rest of your life. You need to find new doctors, and stop finding reasons why you can't do something else. I work with people that say things like that all of the time, everything is "I can't because of xyz...". They get so wrapped up in their illnesses that they let it define them. Also, the people that argue against psych meds in general are ****ing nuts. I've seen completely psychotic people do a 180 thanks to them. You might want to look into an acute setting if you haven't yet, it might help you get some perspective.
Oh, I would love not to be put away for the rest of my life if I find an actual job. I am not sure if I let my illnesses define me, but right now I am doing extremely well in terms of mood stability, anxiety (almost none), pain (minimal), but I have been tired and needing 4 naps a day since the age of 13 - highly fragmented sleep without help from drugs tried yet. I want Xyrem at night and Provigil during the day. Sleep study will determine my issues with sudden cases of sleep paralysis and extreme urges to nap during the day. This issue does not prevent me from seeking a job or working - I most definitely CAN function very well because current drugs don't make me a zombie. What I can't is taking antipsychotics - I really can't take them and do think they take life away to a point where its not a life...its like a "psychological coma".

That video "we are all insane" was horsesh*t. Every living person has symptoms of many mental illnesses, but it is the amount and degree of symptoms that defines having an actual disease. We all get sad and happy and it does not make us bipolar. I, however, get too happy (hypomania) and get too sad (depressed) about minor things and it affects people around me and etc. etc. etc... - bipolar!

bmwservis 01-04-2012 10:38 AM

There should actually be a way to get in if your family ask the right questions. But I would avoid trying in anyway to make your situation look worse than it is, you want to keep as much control over any time inside such a place as you can.

effebrala 01-04-2012 10:44 AM

Quote:

There should actually be a way to get in if your family ask the right questions. But I would avoid trying in anyway to make your situation look worse than it is, you want to keep as much control over any time inside such a place as you can.
It just doesn't work like that here.

Poll Pitt 01-04-2012 10:51 AM

Combination of benzo and opiate probably will make you tired tbh... That is also a very expensive combination and will also be hell to come off of... So if you think you arent going to be able to continue taking that combo then I would start weening off them slowly because stop that combo suddenly and you could literally die from the withdrawal

Stappipsy 01-04-2012 11:21 AM

Quote:

Combination of benzo and opiate probably will make you tired tbh... That is also a very expensive combination and will also be hell to come off of... So if you think you arent going to be able to continue taking that combo then I would start weening off them slowly because stop that combo suddenly and you could literally die from the withdrawal
If I replace it with equivalent dose of generic oxycodone and generic alprazolam - it will not cost much... I hope. Once again, the combo works fine (low doses of each) - it doesn't cause sudden cases of sleep paralysis or the fact that I can take a 30 minute nap and see vivid REM sleep dreams, which shouldn't occur until about 90 minutes into sleep.

Patabeamn 01-04-2012 11:43 AM

Brat, are you overweight ?
If so how much ?

denyffishh 01-04-2012 11:57 AM

Quote:

Brat, are you overweight ?
If so how much ?
Im 6'2 @ 190lbs.


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