[Lorionasodi]

FIP, I disagree with many things you say, but i do not complain as your opinions are your own just as my opinions belong to me.
However, your last post was everything i wanted to say and more. Consider this a virtual handshake and offer of a beer!
what use is advice from someone with no experience?
Maybe the Chinaman that wrote my signature in 400BC should have added... "if you are not a donkey, shut the F*&^ up!"

[boltondd]

The subject of Sin Sod has appeared on these forums a number of times now and it appears that everybody has had a different experience.

My wife is a Bangkok girl and when we decided to get married the subject of Sin Sod never came up. The same when we met her parents and family and told them. Although she had never been married, she was on the wrong side of 35 so maybe that was why. And since we have been married, we have never been approached for money by her family.

So, it apears to me, you should take into the account the age of your fiancee' and the amount asked for. After that, you can only make your own judgement as to what you want to do. Good Luck!

Oh, one other thing, take no notice of Paul Au, he is our resident court jester!

[reervieltnope]

More than the kick I get out of the Sin Sod discussion are reading paul_au's kii neaow comments and the bashing that ensues!

Now while I have no problem with varying amounts of Sin Sod and Farang perhaps paying more, I do have to agree with paul_au as to not being totally forth coming as to your full finacial abilities. I think it's good all around practice.

[DownloadMan]

As far as I can see, It was way to much, People say that we should move our thinking into the Thai way and do things to assimilate ourselves into the way it is done here, There is no way that some Thai guy in Issan [very few at least] could afford 1/2 mil baht sin sod, so that has cut a lot of Thai guys out of the running and set the farang deeper into the dealings for a bride.
500K baht is what you would figure for a hi-so businessman's young, well educated daughter, not some farmers daughter in a village in Issan, here in central a Thai farmer will pay less than 10K for sin sod for his wife.
Plus it has set a precedent for higher sin sod for even farangs that are younger or not so well employed that come here for a bride and they will be asked unheard of amounts for the privilege of giving the girl a better life, even if not here but in the guys home country.
Especially if you pay such high sin sod for the privilege of working along side family members in the rice Paddy's,, unheard of really..

[Lorionasodi]

Obviously i worded my last post wrong. Sorry Paulau. The money was insignificant for me if not you/
But i would appreciate it if you would show a little respect. You assumed my parents were still allive. Thanks for your assumptions!

[DownloadMan]

Sin Sod is always paid before the wedding, the wedding is paid for by the girls parents and usually the money is returned to the couple to start their married life. The gold is kept by the mother usually but it can be returned too if the parents want to return it.
The amount is usually set by your mediator and the folks, and it is really symbolic.
But there is a lot of different things happening now as the westerners do not think they should have to pay it so rules are being changed right along as things progress, but the amount is generally set by your financial well being and ability to pay.

[parurorges]

I paid 450,000 baht and i did not receive any back, nor do i expect to. The money is not exactly a great deal for a farang and haggling over something like this when you consider the difference in income between the farang and the thai family he is marrying into is disrespectful.

True the amount may not be significant to you, it sounds as though you are well established. The problem comes when younger people who are just starting out decide they want to marry and one of them is a farang and the other Thai. Do you know many people having say finished college that would give away that much and say its not a big deal?

[parurorges]

My opinion is that the groom should be mature enough to want to be able to pay a reasonable sin sodt to the parents. The parents should be mature enough to acknowledge that he is doing everying he can and not ask for more. The bride should be thrilled that everyone is getting along and their are no hard feelings.

Tis sad it isnt a perfect world . . .

[Knillagrarp]

Were you dropped on your head as a small child???

[parurorges]

Just a thought I wonder how sin sodt would varry considering it would be paid for a family that had say 2 daughters and one son ve 2 sons and 1 daughter?