[raspirator]

It's a little different when you have teaching responsibilities. But if I have a family commitment, I will arrange for someone else to instruct and attend that. Getting to the recital trumps getting to practice, for sure.

[TyncTyncSah]

OW - I didn't say I was giving up on kendo. I still enjoy it very much, especially practicing with my sons. I feel that I have a better perspective of kendo's place in my life now.

[Vmysobfi]

I'm too young to comment on this, but wouldn't going to kendo be equivalent to those guys going out for bowling or golf?

[patuvammnogoo]

I'm too young to comment on this, but wouldn't going to kendo be equivalent to those guys going out for bowling or golf?

What are you a heretic? Comparing Kendo with bowling or golf! Repent and sin no more! Bowling and golf my ass.

[QysnZWB4]

I gave kendo up after returning from university, it was partly to spend time with my girlfriend because we'd been apart fform each other for so long and also because I didn't drive or have a car.

Then came the first nipper so there was no chance of starting when he was growing up, then came the second, now he's about 15 months and I started back when he was about 8 months old. I regret believing my time at home was time 'spent with my family' because mostly I was probably doing my own thing anyway.

At least now I have something to focus on, something that defines what I'm actually doing with my life at the moment. Don't get me wrong, I'm not one who takes it too seriously and like this week for instance I called off going to kata practice, despite it being the last before my grading, due to family concerns.

It's important to have the support of your better half, deep down I know mine does, though each week it may seem like a battle in itself to get out and do it. I recommend a fair exchange of priveleges. I know that helps if you both get to have 'me time', I wish my wife would, though personally I would be overjoyed if she was 'otherwise engaged' more often. I don't mean that in a bad way, I mean she spends a huge amount of time with the kids so she needs to start spending a fair deal more trying to 'define her free time'

[PickEmUp]

One advantage kendo has over golf is it only takes a couple of hours, whereas golf is a major chunk of your day gone. That's why I only golf 3 or 4 times a year even though I love it - it's just too much time, given how much I already commit to kendo. I know guys who golf 3 times a week, I think they're making a mistake in priorities.

[12dargernswearf]

One advantage kendo has over golf is that I'm ok in kendo; I suck in golf.

[gagagaridze]

I suck at golf also, which is directly related to only playing a few times a year. Only one golfer in 10 breaks 100, or something like that. My serious golfing friends tell me to shoot mid-80s you need to be out twice a week at least, plus practice sessions at the range. To shoot scratch, it's an everyday thing. Frankly golf doesn't interest me enough to devote that much time.

[cingularring]

I only practice Kendo in the weekend. when I have a new baby, my schedule changed but I was still able to practice Kendo. However, when they started to grow up, my own time get lesser and lesser. I wanted to take them out everywhere, show them the World and teach them everything. That was the busiest time of my life.

[Evelinessa]

I'm too young to comment on this, but wouldn't going to kendo be equivalent to those guys going out for bowling or golf?

that's a really good question.

of course, it depends on what golf or bowling means to the person but i am guessing you think of it as a thing someone does purely for recreation. like some people might go clubbing or whatever in the same way?

some people would probably accuse me of taking kendo too seriously, but i put kendo on the same level as work (and school, when i was still taking classes). it isn't for fun; even if i am filling a little under the weather or if i am really not in the mood, i feel that i still have to go to work, i still had to study, and i also still have to go to practice. i even have practice marked out on my work calendar to block out the time. so, to me, it isn't the same thing as just personal play time.

[Lillie_Steins]

Bro, you shoulda put this under training because, IMO, this is one of those areas that's just as valid as anything you do IN practice.

(I owe you an e-mail, by the way! I apologize.) For me, personally, I only missed two weeks of kendo per kid (I have two). You've probably heard me spout off on this before but I have articulated to my wife how important my once a week kendo is and that I am willing to back her up as well. (I actually get in twice a week most weeks, one of them being asa geiko while family is still sleeping - but that had to go on hiatus while kids were not sleeping well and is often an on and off thing.) Backing that up is that I pretty much don't go anywhere during the week - when I'm not at work or at kendo, I'm with family. This is important and supports mom for her once or twice a week outing.

So, I guess the short answer is: two weeks. For me. But every situation is different and you, your wife and your support staff (extended family, etc.) have to be in agreement on it.

[Jon Woodgate]

You guys that went back after 2 weeks make me feel a little p%$$y-whipped...

Nahhh. Listen, man, a colicky kid is a rough ride. Both my kids were and are easily soothed, no digestion troubles or colic, but I know what it's like to have an infant that you can't comfort or that can't be put down at all cuz my kids have had the occasional spell like that. If you got a colicky baby, you got your hands full.

[bestbyV]

A final word on this topic. Post partum depression is a real occurrance. Be sensitive and make sure you address your wife's concerns that she and your child come first. Rather than announce your intention to go to practice I would ask "Would you miss me for a few hours...". Then, pick up some flowers or her favorite sweet treat on the way home.

I may have terrible kumdo, but I have been around.

This will be the hardest part of it (hopefully not) I wish you a great time. It is awesome, pretty much the best in a life time. Old warrior's wisdom is right on target.

But be aware that post partum can creep in. When we had our first child, i was studying & working heavily & didnt notice that my wife was suffering from it. Especially since she had only been speaking english for a little over a year coupled with that fact that she's normally a quiet, reserved person.

If you can do take the maternity leave for fathers (check with your job).
as for kendo, dont worry you'll be back with out notice of time lost. But that baby is going to really lighten up your insides

Congratulations!

[Jalieteplalry]

What are you a heretic? Comparing Kendo with bowling or golf! Repent and sin no more! Bowling and golf my ass.

I bet several golfers and bowlers would say the same thing

that's a really good question.

of course, it depends on what golf or bowling means to the person but i am guessing you think of it as a thing someone does purely for recreation. like some people might go clubbing or whatever in the same way?

some people would probably accuse me of taking kendo too seriously, but i put kendo on the same level as work (and school, when i was still taking classes). it isn't for fun; even if i am filling a little under the weather or if i am really not in the mood, i feel that i still have to go to work, i still had to study, and i also still have to go to practice. i even have practice marked out on my work calendar to block out the time. so, to me, it isn't the same thing as just personal play time.

I think you do kendo because you love it, and I think that the golfers and bowlers are the same. Especially those bowlers that form teams and participate in regional competitions. You know? Kinda like kendo shiais.

Just to tell you guys, I don't golf or bowl, but it's just the first thing that came to mind. I guess it just comes out on the tv often. So, how about this instead? Going out for poker nights or watching the game?

[artenotreah]

So, how about this instead? Going out for poker nights or watching the game?

I haven't been to a poker night in months...

[escolubtessen]

One advantage kendo has over golf is it only takes a couple of hours, whereas golf is a major chunk of your day gone. That's why I only golf 3 or 4 times a year even though I love it - it's just too much time, given how much I already commit to kendo. I know guys who golf 3 times a week, I think they're making a mistake in priorities.

I played golf a lot since I was a kid and eventually had a 9 handicap. I quit because I realized that the only way I could get better would be to give up everything else and devote myself entirely to golf.

I just didn't have that kind of love for golf.

Now kendo, I'm pretty sure that I will never get to world class level or hachidan but there is something different about it. For the last two years it has been physical therapy for me and i am convinced it has saved my life. As I approach 60, I worry about the time when I will not be able to work up a sweat and can't play the young guys anymore.

Poker is no fun anymore since I had to quit smoking cigars.

[Arkadiyas]

I haven't been to a poker night in months...

I've played Dungeons & Dragons/RPGs probably three times total since my kids were born.

Watching the game on the other hand - we have watched a looot of TV since the kids were born, and it's my observation that you do it quite a bit with a new baby, since you spend so much time sitting quietly on the couch holding the lil' bugger (sometimes in the afternoon, sometimes at 2:00 in the morning...)