[EliteFranceska]

I feel as if I'm becoming more ready to take on a Buddhist lifestyle. I've had a few questions answered at these forums that have really helped me out; all of which I greatly appreciate.

I noticed that when I make myself shut up or remain quiet for a certain amount of time, I become more mindful... especially of my mind and how when quiet, I am forced to actually think or calm my thoughts rather as opposed to verbally relieving stress (cursing, yelling, etc.) I think taking a vow of silence (starting for one day) would be good and help me to realize other alternatives to stress relief and how to control my emotions rather than let them rule me.

Has anyone done this and if so, how did it help? Any recommendations?

[Abanijo]

learning to maintain silence in the face of strong sense stimuli (until one's mind is properly composed to response mindfully) is an important practise. Buddha called this 'sense control'

however, instead of asking our advice, we should probably follow yours, as you are finding the path via your intuitive investigations





Sense-control, too, has its nutriment; it is not without a nutriment. And what is the nutriment of sense-control? 'Mindfulness and clear comprehension,' should be the answer.

Mindfulness and clear comprehension, too, have their nutriment; they are not without a nutriment. And what is the nutriment of mindfulness and clear comprehension? 'Wise attention,' should be the answer.

Wise attention, too, has its nutriment; it is not without a nutriment. And what is the nutriment of wise attention? 'Faith,' should be the answer.

Faith, too, has its nutriment; it is not without a nutriment. And what is the nutriment of faith? 'Listening to the True Teaching,' should be the answer.

Listening to the True Teaching, too, has its nutriment; it is not without a nutriment. And what is the nutriment of listening to the True Teaching? 'Association with worthy people,' should be the answer.

Buddha (AN 10.61)

[prkddfokic]

Hi Teep,

In Soto Zen, silence is a core aspect. Sometimes teachings are given in absolute silence just with the presence of the Roshi, his gestures, movements and presence, so to ease the mind leading into samatha and vipassana states of mind.

I think it is good.

[AlistDakisa]

I noticed that when I make myself shut up or remain quiet for a certain amount of time, I become more mindful... especially of my mind and how when quiet, I am forced to actually think or calm my thoughts rather as opposed to verbally relieving stress (cursing, yelling, etc.)

I think taking a vow of silence (starting for one day) would be good and help me to realize other alternatives to stress relief and how to control my emotions rather than let them rule me.

Has anyone done this and if so, how did it help? Any recommendations?

Sounds like a good idea, Teep.

I tend to be quite talkative, so I find it useful just to remember to give others an opportunity to speak and to listen carefully, rather than interrupt them with my own babblings all the time !

In general, I also think that allowing others some space and relaxing into that space oneself can minimise any reactive and emotional responses to them.

I found silent retreats very helpful in the past because my mind began to settle and became more aware.

[Centurnion]

Thanks for the comments! Pretty excited about trying it out but not so much excited about how the family will react.

[bingookenoo]

Most Buddhist retreats are held in silence for a reason, in some ways I think this is the best part, so if you think that was good wait until you spend a week or two on a silent meditation retreat!

In fact I recommend that you do.

[251EPyso]

I haven't formally taken any vows of silence, but a day of silence is not uncommon for me. I'm on the quieter side and tend to speak only when necessary. In my adolescence, there were days I could go without talking. This was largely driven by anxiety, but I've since improved. Now, it is not that I'm afraid. I am simply comfortable - actually at home - with silence.

Like others have suggested, I would also recommend a silent retreat, as everyone involved has agreed to take a vow of silence. In daily life, silence can be misinterpreted and looked down upon, especially in situations where speech is necessary to maintain social etiquette. Silent retreats, on the other hand, are much more conducive to quietude.