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Old 02-25-2012, 01:08 AM   #1
VoriEremiagem

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Default How did you tell your loved ones you'd become a Buddhist?
This is a question for the group from Searching1990 :


"Im yet to tell my family about the choice I have made.. if its ok me asking,

how did the guys and girls here go about telling their loved ones about the choices

they had made ? "





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Old 02-25-2012, 01:46 AM   #2
itaspCatCriny

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I just told them. Everyone in my immediate family is basically atheist or close to it. Same thing with a large portion of my friends actually. They would be very puzzled and it might even cause for concern if I turned to one of the abrahamic religions instead.
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Old 02-25-2012, 03:05 AM   #3
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Thats my problem, My family heritage is Catholic and ive never really believed what they believe, im not the kind of person who will allow another to force their views on me, i will go along with them if I agree, if that makes sense, i hope it does.
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Old 02-25-2012, 04:16 AM   #4
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Justen, my advice is not to get into confrontation because you have become a Buddhist. There is no need.

To become a Buddhist is about taking refuge in Buddha as the teacher, in the Dhamma as the teaching and in the Sangha as those who have followed the path toward awakening bringing us inspiration.

You do not need to demonstrate nothing at all but just to cultivate a peaceful mind free from attachments and cravings and kindness and good will for the others.

For example, if you were to practice mediation you can have it in your room, alone, when home is in silence, not messing around with anybody.

Also nobody will really know it but just your shift into a more peaceful disposition toward live facts.

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Old 02-25-2012, 05:28 AM   #5
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i completely agree with that Esho, its not that I intend confrontation or to bug people with my being buddhist, its more what will they think, i know some texts say that you cut other connections but my family has supported me through hard times before i discovered buddhism, I would be concerned that they will not agree with my choice of life paths. Is it wrong to feel like this.
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Old 02-25-2012, 05:36 AM   #6
rusculture

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hi Searching

if you are willing to answer:

for what reasons are you interested in Buddhism?

for what reasons are you not interested in Catholicism?

answering these questions may help this discussion

thanks
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Old 02-25-2012, 06:41 AM   #7
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Hmm that is a good question, it has taken me sometime to think about it, there are many reasons that came to mind. (all of these are my opinion, they may be incorrect but no offence is meant to any party)

Firstly Budhism does have the Precepts among other things but from what I have understood, A Buddhist may choose weather or not to live by them, Catholocism on the other hand (from my experience) is cery scornful if you do not live by their rules to the letter.

Gautama was biologically, no different from me or you, he is proven to have existed, his teachings came from his mouth (now the historian in me would say that untill hundreds of years later his teachings where no written down, word of mouth being an unreliable source even from the war so how can it be reliable over several hundreds of years), with catholocism, it came from A God, who has not been proven to exist and maybe never will be proven to exist.

From what I gather part of Buddhism is questioning things having your own perception where as catholcism has no room for opinion and questioning.

I dont know, all I do know is I dont feel comfortable with the Catholocism and Buddhism just feels right.
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Old 02-25-2012, 08:56 PM   #8
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I haven't told them in such certain terms as "I am Buddhist" as such. But I lent them my kindle to have a play with (they were considering buying one) and they found books by the Dalai Lama on there and asked about it. I just said I'm exploring Buddhism. And I also told them I go to classes on it. Most of the time I'll say I'm going to the temple but for them I just say I'm going to classes. It's all in the wording, they get less weirded out by classes then any formalised religious centre.
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Old 02-25-2012, 09:24 PM   #9
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There is no need to run around shouting about religion, but at the same time if someone asks I will respond as i neccessary.
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Old 02-25-2012, 10:41 PM   #10
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Justen,

Why you find challenging telling your beloved ones about Buddhism? Are they imposing you to be a Catholic?

By the time I found Buddhism I was already an independent person but also at a very early age I asked them not to force me any more into religion or any sort of believe, and fortunately, even while being myself so young, they respected that.

But I know that some families are quite rude imposing believes to their members. Is this your case?
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Old 02-26-2012, 04:04 AM   #11
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It's not that they are imposing me to believe in Catholicism, People in my family have chosen not to follow the family religion, my Mother being a semi example, I don't really know how she feels because she lost her dad as a child. But No one has ever followed a different path entirely.
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Old 02-26-2012, 04:15 AM   #12
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That went allot better than I expected....my mum said oh ok, and my dad said does that mean I can eat your meat and drink your booze when you come over for dinner.
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Old 02-26-2012, 04:21 AM   #13
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That went allot better than I expected....my mum said oh ok, and my dad said does that mean I can eat your meat and drink your booze when you come over for dinner.
That's a really good response !

I left home when I was a teenager - but in later years when I went back to visit my parents and told them I was a Buddhist , they were very angry and convinced I'd joined something really weird.

.
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Old 02-26-2012, 05:42 AM   #14
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I am sorry to hear.

I suppose from someone who doesnt know what Buddhism is, it could be considered weird as it is not like most religions (although peronally I see Buddhism more as a way of life) Like anything new, it can be scary...

Like a roller coaster, the first you see one, its intimidating, its scary and unknown.....but after your first ride you want to get back on because your no longer afraid of the unknown.
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Old 02-26-2012, 06:42 AM   #15
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That went allot better than I expected....my mum said oh ok, and my dad said does that mean I can eat your meat and drink your booze when you come over for dinner.
Great Justen,

:hug:
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Old 02-26-2012, 07:33 AM   #16
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That went allot better than I expected....my mum said oh ok, and my dad said does that mean I can eat your meat and drink your booze when you come over for dinner.
Your Dads response cracked me up with laughter Justen, take care and I hope you find as much in Buddhism as I have.
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Old 02-26-2012, 07:35 AM   #17
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That response I did, im just waiting for the jokes, he is probably already researching buddhism to find anything he can make a joke out of to try and get a negative re action from me.
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Old 02-26-2012, 07:54 AM   #18
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Sounds like a typical British male - I'm from a very working class background Justen and most of my closest friends are and they do like to make jokes about my Buddhism, I either patiently explain or bedazzle them with a piece of Buddhist thought that confuses them so much that they return to talking about the football or what is on at the cinema where my mate works.
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Old 02-26-2012, 10:30 PM   #19
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I can't do that with out being a hipocrit though as I have always said that a person religion and beliefs should be there own and should only educate another if that person asks about it.
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Old 02-26-2012, 10:37 PM   #20
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I'm not trying to convert them Justen - they asked in their own way, what they do with that information is there own affair.
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