[kentbrookug]

This past year has been devastating to me. Lost a business, house, car, went through a divorce, my daughter lives in another state with her mom with limited visits and now I can barely make my own ends meet from week to week.

What does buddhism say about dealing with this and is there a way to not stress over these things so much?

[DailyRingtone]

hello Roadrunner

it is also devastating to read about your situation...the Buddha did say financial hardship is suffering (here)...the Buddha included livelihood as part of his path

i can recall a time in my life when i had injured myself & had many worries about being able to get a job...i must say, this was the worst kind of suffering

how to not stress over these things so much? some suggestions are:

(1) try to reflect the world follows causes & conditions and that currently, due to the causes & conditions of incorrect financial practises & govt policy, many parts of the world suffer from economic crisis, unemployment & loss of livelihood & assets, particulary in the USA. due to causes & conditions, often beyond your control, your situation has arisen, which is similar to many other individuals. thus reflect your situation is due to causes & conditions that are difficult control

(2) try to reflect in this world, despite the corruption, there are good people who care for you & are willing to support you is whatever way they can. try to nurture faith in humanity and your own humanity

(3) humble yourself to take any job you can

(4) consider generating compassion for those who are in a similar situation as you and try to share with them whatever you can so emotions of loving-kindness can bring your some mind comradery & happiness

(5) try to reflect you are still alive and stress & peace are states of mind. there is the potential to develop peace of mind through understanding & letting go

(6) possibly consider some time out in a monastery for a while, where you can work, be fed & housed, be amongst kind people and gain some exposure & insight into the spiritual way of life

(7) possibly consider immigrating to somewhere like Australia or finding a work placement overseas, where there remains need for basic employees, especially in the mining industry. for example

Can I apply for a job in a country other than my own?

BHP Billiton offers a broad range of career opportunities around the globe. However, BHP Billiton does not have a policy of automatically sponsoring candidates who are not authorised to work in a specific country. If you have the required skills and experience for the position, we suggest you make an application.

BHP Billiton i can only repeat that i empathise with your feeling of devastation because having livelihood is the most basic condition of human life

it is difficult but try to generate faith & trust that there are people who care & change can come for the better (example, here)

with metta

Element

[inownsuipsy]

Thank you so much Element. I should clarify, I do have a good job of which I am extremely grateful. Just that my check doesn't cover my bills after being so far behind on legal fees, etc. I would love to go to a monestary but that would mean leaving the good job I have which also pays well but also involves helping others. The other points are very good though.

[Bounce]

roadrunner, going to a monastery to live is a legit option to consider, but only if you're doing it for the right reason. If you go there to escape the stresses of daily life in society and have a place to relax, you may not last long in a monastery. If you go there to escape the stresses of daily life in society in order to facilitate penetrating the dhamma as deeply as you can, you would fare better, I think. And it need not be a permanent decision, anyway.

But, like you said, having a good job that pays you well to help people...that'd be pretty hard to walk away from. Maybe you can sacrifice some of your more expensive possessions or hobbies or aspects of your lifestyle until you get the finances back under control?

[Longwow]

I've stripped down to as many basics as possible. I'm still making payments on my TV and cable, but thats kind of my entertainment. I have some decent raises coming in the spring, just a matter of staying afloat until then and not driving myself crazy in the meantime.

[CreativeAcrobate]

hi roadrunner

i am very happy & relieved to read you do have a good job

down under in Australia, via the media, the situation sounds hard for many in the USA

the law of impermanence also works on the side of things becoming better, as your pay rises and repayments lessen

so reflection on impermanence can also be helpful

also, buddha taught to try to avoid debt as much as we can (here)

with metta

element

[attackDoold]

Hi Roadrunner,

I think the advice given thus far has been quite helpful, so I need not offer any of my own. I do hope things improve for you, though. As element has said, this is one aspect of impermanence that we can use to our benefit; in knowing that all of these conditions are temporary and this can give us hope, actually! Normally we are reminded of impermanence in the other sense; when we lose something, or when something comes to an end.

I think sometimes it is easy to live in accordance with Dharma (or any religion for that matter) when things are going well for us, but not always so easy to gain a perspective when times are tougher. I'm your "northern neighbor" in Canada, and it is quite tough here as well for many people- just like everywhere it seems. People with degrees having to take any old job just to make their ends meet, while others in certain industries are having to enter new careers. I think it is like a bad storm in that we all must take shelter for a little while and then when things stabilize we can all get back on our feet again.

But I wish you the best.

Terma

[sestomosi]

I've stripped down to as many basics as possible. I'm still making payments on my TV and cable, but thats kind of my entertainment. I have some decent raises coming in the spring, just a matter of staying afloat until then and not driving myself crazy in the meantime.

I've been there, man. In my experience, as long as you can demonstrate sincere efforts at repaying your debts, they'll restructure your payments accordingly. Just be open and honest with your finances and they will work with you, I think. Best to you! Ride out the storm with the assurance that it is impermanent, like everything else.

[Inettypofonee]

Dear roadrunner,

Such looses are difficult to deal with. It is hard to tell not to be stressed at all. To keep some kind of standard of living can lead sometimes to mental exhaustion. Maybe can be of some help to realize such inconvenience or maybe is a good chance to dedicate some time to simpler things which will bring more joy and peacefulness of mind.