[GlictStiply]

Dealing with Negative environments.

This is a huge subject, and entails the whole of life, one's beliefs, one's view.
We do live in a negative environment...of our minds! Saying 'we' means all of us: this is quite a shock when you consider it! This planet is lovely, but it is inhabited by sentient beings who cling to ideas about themselves and everyone else.
This clinging is a not-knowing of our true nature, and could be called negative.
Resting in our true nature would then be seen as positive, but we do not notice this nature and so we live in a negative world! Oh, we can put on a brave face, and make things seem better, but these are only temporary fixes.

It's starting to sound scary, isn't it? Well, it needn't!

First we have to look at a touchy area...our beliefs. Now comes a really touchy area: what we believe may only be a partial system that is incomplete. Everyone's journey is different, but step by step we progress...get stuck...get emotional...resolve...progress...

So we go through stages of dissatisfaction...satisfaction...dissatisfaction.. .rough...smooth...

The individual temperament will dictate how fast we go through all this. If we adopt a system that is incomplete, there will be gaps in how to deal with everything.

If we say, “Well I'm self taught,” that is not altogether true, unless we have been in an isolated cave all our lives without contact with anyone! If we have senses and a mind, and have had contact with others, we will have been influenced. But this information may be incomplete, and as a result of that, any trauma that occurs will overtake us.

At this point, we come back to the subtle information body where feelings are stored. We can start to see how our lives are controlled by mistaken information – and this is maintained by everyone else around us. This situation is not helped by the corporate world!

We are bombarded by advertising about living the perfect dream, so naturally we will feel dissatisfied because life is just not like that. But somewhere, deep inside our minds, we think it should be. As a result of this constant disappointment, many people become more negative than normal. If one listens to (or reads) some people's patterning, it will all sound negative: they can't help having a go!

The type of negativity that arise most commonly in me is perceiving a pointlessness in everything.
I go...“What's the point?!”
This brings us back to the value of having a complete system. It's not so much dealing with other people's emotions - it's dealing with our own emotions and reactions: all systems offer plenty of antidotes to counteract our negative emotions (the only way to counteract someone else's negative emotions is to give them space, by not reacting).

The simplest answer IS love - un-conditional love. Now that is a tall order!
We begin with love for ourselves.
Not with criticism or blame or guilt or fear of our reactions. None of these are us.
Most of the time we fear our own reactions, and so we set up a barrier of defence around ourselves. We expect ourselves to be better. We want to be better at all sorts of things, but life is pretty short, so it is easy to feel a failure isn't it?

Much of the information in our heads is put there, and has nothing to do with our true being. We have to discern what is useful and what is not. The point of meditation is to separate ourself from those thoughts. Once that has been done, we are in awareness. This awareness looks in o itself and finds...nothing - pure awareness. It is empty and has a knowing quality...Pure Essence.

OK, so now we come to the good bit!
Pure Essence is a dry awareness.
Its expression is the juice...Pure Love. A Pure Heart!

Because we are not enlightened, emotions will still arise, even though we have had a glimpse of this Essence Love. This is because our awareness of essence has dimmed or gone unnoticed, and we are attached again to the feeling of “I”, and our mental image of self.

Once we have this glimpse of Essence, any emotion that arises is seem as a temporary event of an “I” identification and has absolutely no reality. The emotions are now the teacher, showing us that we have moved away from Essence.

Knowing Essence is very simple, and will be recognised through practice or through having it pointed out at the right time. It is slightly different from
just being aware. It doesn't matter if one isn't totally certain about Essence. It is just there.
Without it, we would not exist, but equally, we cannot say it exists.
I once saw a child fall over, and my impulse was to rush over to help...that was Essence Love.
However, the thought came in, “It's not my child, so I shouldn't interfere,” and I noticed that everyone else reacted the same way. I'd moved from essence to “I”.

That is the negative environment.

Even though there maybe things going on in the world, these are merely temporary external events. We shouldn't believe everything we read on forums like this!
We have to be aware of fear mongering and false promises of hope with the calvary coming.
These are subjects for comics...and they are both causes and products of a negative environment.

This negative environment is our teacher, if we can see it as such. It never truly existed in the first place: it may feel real, but it is not true.
If we can't see it as our teacher, we can just be kind to ourself, as this all takes time to digest.

Genuine Love is like a virus...it's catching!

One very last thing, we all want to make things better, to right all wrongs, to have peace in the family. It's not necessarily going to happen, in this incarnation. People need time and space, and there is a lot of time and a lot of space. In their own time they will come round to where they want to go, all we can do is not leave obstacles in the way.


Kind regards,
Tony

[Breeriacoirl]

Dear Tony,

Thanks for sharing.. but that was a very long post to read in one posting box and reads like a lot of personal thoughts/statements in a blog. ( there's no provision for blogging at BWB)

Can you state briefly what it is in particular that you would like to discuss/debate for a topic with the rest of the group, please, because I'm not at all clear about that, and we are primarily a website for interactive discussions.

Personally I just try to accept whatever exterior environment I'm in and then act spontaneously according to my practice and understanding at that time.

As far as mental activity is concerned, my opinion is that studying the core teachings of Buddha together with regular samatha meditation and the practice of mindfulness can help to start lessening reactive emotions and a lot of unnecessary mental proliferation.


Kind regards

Aloka

[Pszinygv]

Dear Aloka,

I write on other sites, and someone asked about dealing with negativity.
This was just a reply, and thought it might help here.

Not everyone knows how to deal with negativity, even Buddhists.

Tony

[deackatera]

Not everyone knows how to deal with negativity, even Buddhists.

This might possibly be helpful:




ACCEPTING THE WAY THINGS ARE

by Ajahn Sumedho


How many of you have been practising today trying to become something 'I have got to do this ... or become that ... or get rid of something ... or got to do something...' That compulsiveness takes over, even in our practice of Dhamma. 'This is the way it is' isn't a fatalistic attitude of not caring or being indifferent, but is a real openness to the way things have to be at this moment. For example, right now at this moment this is the way it is and it can't be any other way at this moment. It's so obvious, isn't it?

Right now, no matter whether you are feeling high or low or indifferent, happy or depressed, enlightened or totally deluded, half-enlightened, half-deluded, three-quarters deluded, one-quarter enlightened, hopeful or despairing - this is the way it is. And it can't be any other way at this moment.

How does your body feel? Just notice that the body is this way. It's heavy, it's earthbound, it's coarse, it gets hungry, it feels heat and cold, it gets sick, sometimes it feels very nice, sometimes it feels very horrible. This is the way it is. Human bodies are like this; so that this tendency to want it to be otherwise falls away. It doesn't mean we can't try to make things better, but we do so from understanding and wisdom rather than from an ignorant desire.

The world is this way and things happen, and it snows and the sun comes out, and people come and go, people have misunderstandings, people's feelings get hurt. People get lazy, and inspired and people get depressed and disillusioned, people gossip and disappoint each other and there is adultery and there's theft, drunkenness and drug addiction and there are wars, and there always have been.




Continued at link :


http://www.amaravati.org/documents/t..._is/10atw.html

[Siuchingach]

I am so agree with the words of Ajahn Sumedho. I also belief that if you let past being past and future being future and live in this moment, the stress and suffering of life will be more easy to handle.

[Ceakicknunk]

Ok, my question would be:
Why do buddhists hide behind a plethora of terminology and ritual when it comes to ordinary people's problems, like dealing with negativity?

I have observed three types of practitioners:
The religious = love rituals.
The philosophers = love dictionaries.
The experiencials = love moments....(there aren't many of those.)

At retreats none of these three types can talk to one another - we nod, smile and move on.
If I talk about a problem in the world, most buddhists say, “I do my practice, and I'm alright” or “all is as it is” or words to that effect. In other words, ignore someone else's problem!

Sometimes it feels like the medicine has become the disease.

This actually brings us to the different attitudes or vehicles to deal with the so-called negative emotions. For those that do not know the allegory, there is a bush with poison berries on it, this represents the negative emotions.

Hinayana, will not go near it. They cut any association with it, but it will always return.
Mahayana, will put a fence around it. They antidotes, but this is still a temporary fix.
Vajrayana, will see it as medicine. They will see poisons as wisdom.
Dzogchen/Mahamudra, will know that the poison never existed in the first place.

Here is the twist – Some who think themselves Dzogchen/Mahamudra practitioner are actually Hinayana. Like wise some Hinayana have a Dzogchen/Mahamudra attitude.

It does not matter what people say, it is how they react that reveals all. All I'm saying is do not let anyone pull the wool over your eyes, don't forget to be a decent compassionate human being.

I apologise for the use of any terminology that might confuse, no Dharma practitioner was hurt in this presentation!


Tony

[Nurba]

Hinayana.....Hinayana ....

Hi Tony, just as an aside - as you are a Tibetan Buddhist practitioner, I wonder if you are aware that 'Hinayana' can be used as a pejorative term to describe Theravada, which is why we try to avoid its use here (except perhaps jokingly).



The myth of Hinayana

In the centuries around the birth of Christ there was a radical development going on in Buddhism. A new school was born, and its adherents called it Mahayana. How this new school differed from the earlier schools, can be found in any history of Buddhism. Here we will concentrate on one of the results of this schism: the term Hinayana.

The adherents of the older schools criticized the Mahayanists, especially for creating new sutras, forging the word of the Buddha. The Mahayanists on the other side reacted to that critique by accusing their opponents of not understanding the teaching of the Buddha at all and for beeing narrowminded egoists. The debate got heated, and accusations flowed from both sides. Then some brilliant person at the Mahayana side of the debate created the word pair Mahayana/Hinayana, and it stuck. They called their opponents Hinayana, and this word worked excellently as an insult – with a simplicity and a parallellity to Mahayana that any fool could grasp.


continued:

http://www.lienet.no/hinayan1.htm


kind regards

Aloka

[auctionlover]

I think most Buddhist are understanding and nice people I can only speak for my self but in my practise as a Buddhist its the attachments i try to get rid of, and someone who dont know we can sometimes call me cold because i dont show to much emotions, but inside me i have a lot of emotions. When it come to the negative side of life, as a Buddhist i see negativity as a karmic reaction to something that has happen in life, and from that view i need to understand what i did wrong before to get in to that negative situation. everything in life happens for a reason

The thinker

[optormtix]

I have observed three types of practitioners:
The religious = love rituals.
The philosophers = love dictionaries.
The experiencials = love moments....(there aren't many of those.)

If all these types of practitioners are wrong what in your view would be the characteristics of the right kind of practitioner?

[verizon]

If all these types of practitioners are wrong what in your view would be the characteristics of the right kind of practitioner?

They are not wrong, just different temperaments. 'Right' would probably all three combined. So, discipline, proper understanding, but above seeing our reactions as our teacher.

[espabamar]

We create our world, our reactions maintains it. How we deal with this is an individual issue, based on what we find as satisfying.
Here we have every right to change, as the path to enlightenment is a refining of perception. At every level perception changes.
So it is a constant letting go. However learning is painful, but we learn.

Ego is merely a word given to the action of consciousness, clinging. Until enlightenment there will be ego of some sort.

Tony

[Madjostok]

Hi Tony, just as an aside - as you are a Tibetan Buddhist practitioner, I wonder if you are aware that 'Hinayana' can be used as a pejorative term to describe Theravada, which is why we try to avoid its use here (except perhaps jokingly).





kind regards

Aloka

It is important to never forget Hinayana practice. It should be included in advanced practices.

[topbonuscasino]

I my self are an Theravada Buddhist and no matter what other call the way i follow, i cant let that be a problem for me if someone want to joke about it i will just smile back to them )

" If someone treat you bad, then smile to them and think, you just made my day better "

[sciectotacype17]

It is important to never forget Hinayana practice. It should be included in advanced practices.

More about the term 'Hinayana'


The word Hīnayāna is formed of hīna (हीन): "poor", "inferior","abandoned", "deficient", "defective;" and yāna (यान): "vehicle", where "vehicle" means "a way of going to enlightenment". The Pali Text Society's Pali-English Dictionary (1921–25) defines hīna in even stronger terms, with a semantic field that includes "poor, miserable; vile, base, abject, contemptible," and "despicable."

In the Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese and Japanese languages, the term was translated by Kumārajīva and others as "small vehicle" (小 meaning "small", 乘 meaning "vehicle"), although earlier and more accurate translations of the term also exist. In Mongolian (Baga Holgon) term for Hinayana also means "small" or "lesser" vehicle,while in Tibetan there are at least two words to designate the term, theg chung (Tibetan: ཐེག་ཆུང་) meaning "small vehicle", and theg dman (Tibetan: ཐེག་དམན་) meaning "inferior vehicle" or "inferior spiritual approach".


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hinayana#Etymology
Hi Tony

There are a range of meanings with an extremely negative connotation and so the use of that word isn't an appropriate one to describe practices and teachings in a mixed tradition group such as this one.

I am a former Vajrayana practitioner myself and am very much aware of what it implies, so lets not use it, please, or even perhaps assume that one tradition has more advanced practices than another just because it says so.

Thanks

[selayeffethy]

I my self are an Theravada Buddhist and no matter what other call the way i follow, i cant let that be a problem for me if someone want to joke about it i will just smile back to them )

" If someone treat you bad, then smile to them and think, you just made my day better "

Confidence in one's path is so important. We are beyond names. Good for you!

[clapsoewmred]

Thank you for the kind words Tony

The thinker

[EmpokemyMok]

More about the term 'Hinayana'



Hi Tony

There are a range of meanings with an extremely negative connotation and so the use of that word isn't an appropriate one to describe practices and teachings in a mixed tradition group such as this one.

I am a former Vajrayana practitioner myself and am very much aware of what it implies, so lets not use it, please, or assume that one tradition has more 'advanced' practices than another just because it says so.

Thanks

Okidoki! I always saw it as discipline, though a little rigid.
We all have to good through some sort of boot camp!

I don't mind what I'm called...though I like good friend best!:hug:

[PhotoSHOPadob]

I don't mind what I'm called...though I like good friend best!:hug:

.

Yes indeed, and its very nice when we can all be good friends here.

[WGRocky]

Are the negative emotions enemies or friends?

This will depend on your point of view. Note, your point of view, not someone else telling you, your point of view. If we are told to view the poisons as enemies you will see them as enemies. If we are told to view the poisons as wisdoms, we will see them as wisdoms.

They are both! From one point of view they are obscuration to realising Essence. From another point of view, they are a reminder of Essence.

Sometimes the teachings have to be adapted to suit the western mind. Westerns are very alert and conscious, tell them to be more conscious will make them go round the bend! That is suitable for easterners who do not have so much emotional problems but may be more sleepy.

We have emotional problems. And have to be dealt with in a different way.

It's like talking about EGO as if it's a sin, this is a control mechanism, to create guilt. Ego is merely a word for consciousness holding onto concepts. Gently being aware of this loosens the grip. Making a big deal out of it, only makes it seem more real, when it's not real at all.

There will be some sort of ego until enlightenment. What is compassion or love but expression essence, there is a little ego there. Isn't it wonderful!

We must never forget human warmth.

Kind regards,
Tony

[XzBZB2UV]

Teachings can be confusing.

When I go on retreat, which is in silence, people seem to become Zombies. I had to put a notice up saying, “ You are not zombies, being silent does not mean don't smile!” The only people that were normal, were the dinner ladies who fed us!

Remember we are free spirits.