[hygtfrdes]

This question was asked with a lot of personal input on another forum and I wondered how our members would respond.

If a member of your family or a dear friend was dying...and was seeing deceased friends and relatives...but they didn't want to die...would you tell them to go toward the light anyway...or would you tell them they didn't have to go?

Do you truly think that these people, that close to death, actually see those who have crossed and do you think they are waiting to help them cross? Or do you think it's all delusions of a dying brain?

As many of us are ordained...what is our responsibility to the dying party and to their family when confronted with these tales?

[usadatronourl]

First, we should listen with out judgment.
No matter what title we may come to the table with,so to speak.

Second,I believe if one is dying and sees the already decease family/loved ones, yes I think they are there to help them cross over.

Would I tell them to go to the light,not in those words exactly.

I would how ever say "Its o.k. to go home,nothing to be afraid of".
I had to do that with 2 of my own family members,after telling them it was o.k. they crossed over peacefully.

I think some are waiting for the o.k. to go home,that they hang on for the living not necessarily for themselves.

[pepBarihepe]

If a member of your family or a dear friend was dying...and was seeing deceased friends and relatives...but they didn't want to die...would you tell them to go toward the light anyway...or would you tell them they didn't have to go?

That would depend on the person, and the situation.

Do you truly think that these people, that close to death, actually see those who have crossed and do you think they are waiting to help them cross? Or do you think it's all delusions of a dying brain?

I don't think it really matters. The 'reality' of the situation is not the point. I think it matters more on what those people/delusions do for the situation.

If a dying man sees his deceased wife waiting for him on the other side, and it makes the act of dying easier for him, what difference does it make if she's not actually real?

As many of us are ordained...what is our responsibility to the dying party and to their family when confronted with these tales?

To allow all of the involved parties deal with the circumstance in the way best fitting their belief/psychology.

[tilmprarnerit]

I believe that it is est to sit is silent meditation or prayer when we are with someone who is dying. On their deathbed many saintly persons have seen beloved friends and family members. Let them enjoy those visions.

Hermano Luis

[Binuilienzync]

~ My father hit his head. He was in another city & we finally tracked him down to a hospital that wouldn't say anything. We drove there expecting the worse & there he was!
Chatty, a big gash on his head, but doing seemingly well. We went every day.
Within 5 days he wasn't talking, couldn't move. Had a stroke.
A football game was on {he always loved sports, even on radio} & we were talking about that one game where the announcers couldn't see the game & the cameras were snowed out? & suddenly he clearly said the teams & year & then was in a coma.
The next day we told him how much we loved him, how he'd never be forgotten & that he was a fine wonderful man, he'd done a really good job & we loved him. He could rest.
He died.
{The 'we' was my husband, my sister & my mother, his ex-wife he still loved, & me. }

Someone dying needs all the comfort they can get.
It's frightening & usually painful & shouldn't be done alone.

[Coellacag]

If a member of your family or a dear friend was dying...and was seeing deceased friends and relatives...but they didn't want to die...would you tell them to go toward the light anyway...or would you tell them they didn't have to go?

Life is short; eternity is a long time.

I'd say, "Hang on as long as you can. I'm here for you."

[LarryRda]

Delusions of the mind...the human mind has an inability to accept things it doesn't know or understand ~chuckles~.

I remember the things that happened to me when I died. They were very weird, but it could have been in my mind, I just don't know ~smiles~.

Life is for living, no on this earth/plane knows what the afterlife holds, and those who think they do are most likely wrong ~chuckles~. So live like everyday is your last ~smiles~

I would do what I could to help my friend live including sedate the crap out of them if they started going wacko on me ~smiles~

[esanamaserrn]

wether what they see is real or not is not the point.in tibetian buddhism,one sometimes sees a bright white light(the light of true self),and within it they may see someone or something(their yidam).the idea is to let them know it's nothing to be afraid of and to embrace this light.

if it's not their time to go,then they won't.but if it is,there is nothing in the universe going to stop it from happining.my thoughts,let them know there is no need to fear the unknown as they will soon know more than all of us put togther.

[citicroego]

if it's not their time to go,then they won't.but if it is,there is nothing in the universe going to stop it from happining.my thoughts,let them know there is no need to fear the unknown as they will soon know more than all of us put togther.

I agree with Mark. If it is their time to pass, it is not our job to attempt to have them stay. In ages past, Pagans would "sing" the dying across to the other side. This act provided comfort to the one passing by assuring them that they were not alone as they prepared to cross over.

It is unethical, in my opinion, to attempt to hold a person to this plane when the Dark Mother is calling them. It flies in the face of karma.

[Sawyer]

It is unethical, in my opinion, to attempt to hold a person to this plane when the Dark Mother is calling them. It flies in the face of karma.

The movie title "heaven can wait" applies here. The Dark Mother calls, if one fights to reject her, does she go away and leave them? Maybe for a short time, but she will always come back to reclaim them at time of death.

I say, "live and fight to live."
--------------------------------------

Now explain what karma has to do with it? Karma is doing what is right. The fight within is part of nature. How can telling another to fight goes against nature? Sure death is nature to, but its natural to try to cling to life. - You may think this is fear of the Dark Mother, but it could be simple love for live.

Interesting discussion....please continue it.

[SoftrermaBioniaSat]

Yes Y'all. Interesting discussion. I know. I haven't commented yet, but I am reading.

Peace & Love!

[erepsysoulptnw]

The movie title "heaven can wait" applies here. The Dark Mother calls, if one fights to reject her, does she go away and leave them? Maybe for a short time, but she will always come back to reclaim them at time of death.

I say, "live and fight to live."
--------------------------------------

Now explain what karma has to do with it? Karma is doing what is right. The fight within is part of nature. How can telling another to fight goes against nature? Sure death is nature to, but its natural to try to cling to life. - You may think this is fear of the Dark Mother, but it could be simple love for live.

Interesting discussion....please continue it.

karma is the law of cause and effect.so in that thought,what would happen if we"talk"someone into fighting death(which makes it all the harder for them to make the transition)or worse yet,"talk" them into giving up.i stand by what i said that death is not going to happen till it's time,and there is nothing to stop it;but what kind of harm would we be causing the person and the balance of the universe?

wether it's fear or a love for life,at least in my beliefs,that is attachment that will only cause suffering.and no,i'm in no hurry to test this out.

[Eujacwta]

karma is the law of cause and effect.so in that thought,what would happen if we"talk"someone into fighting death(which makes it all the harder for them to make the transition)or worse yet,"talk" them into giving up.i stand by what i said that death is not going to happen till it's time,and there is nothing to stop it;but what kind of harm would we be causing the person and the balance of the universe?

wether it's fear or a love for life,at least in my beliefs,that is attachment that will only cause suffering.and no,i'm in no hurry to test this out.

Can we really do anything wrong? I mean we all try to do the right thing. Sometimes later we find out it was the wrong thing and have to suffer then forgive ourselves.

I agree karma is the law of cause and effect. However, I prefer to think of it as "doing the right thing."

I don't believe we can "talk" anyone into either fighting or giving up. We can influence people, but we cannot control their actions. Each person will do what he or she believes is right.

As for "attachment will cause suffering" so is love and life suffering. Suffering is to have lived a fulfilled life.

I still say, "live and fight to live."

[ebookinfo]

Boy! Talk about the light!

Y'all know that I am not a religious person but I just can't help being moved whenever I hear Hank Williams Sr. sing "I Saw The Light".

Listen and see what I mean:

http://www.foxytunes.com/artist/hank..._saw_the_light

Peace & Love!

[QiuCIOdO]

Hank Williams (all three of 'em in my opinion) are the Man! And that's a great song, Jim.

[soineeLom]

When I recently lost an Aunt, this came into play. She was ninety-nine and felt that it was not her time. She still wanted to do more. I believe that her inner greatness kept her here this long because she just could not accept not doing more. It was not in her being.

She often spoke of her husband and a daughter she had lost young. Both had lived in that particular house with her until they died. SHe wanted to be in that house when she died.

Unfortunately, her body did not agree. At our final conversation, I admitted that she had always been an example to me to not accept giving up. I wanted her to be here forever, but I was just being selfish. That night after having pizza with her son who was taking care of her, she became sick and went into a coma. She held on about 4 days.

She often spoke of her husband and a daughter she had lost young. Both had lived in that particular house with her until they died. She wanted to be in that house when she died. Her local family paid for her to have at home care to make this happen. No one has ever regretted spending that money to keep her there.

I never told her to let go and go home. If I did she would have smiled and lovingly done what she wanted. In my experience I hoped that I could see Bob, her husband patiently waiting for her to get ready. I am sure that she always was ready when she was ready.

Sorry I rambled. Her memory is always a blessing and I enjoy sharing it.

[Meenepek]

Our mother passed last August, she was sick for a while.
But she wasn't ready to go, even when the Alzhiemers had taken her ability to communicate she fought.

(Before I continue, you need to know that she had became totally incapacitated.
Couldn't talk, had her eyes closed all the time, couldn't control her bodily functions and she had been this way for a year or more.)

Then her lungs & kidneys started to shut down, she was moved to hospice and placed on life support.
(God bless the folks at Hospice of Dayton)

We told her it was ok to go when she was ready.

As we sat there (my sister, aunte, uncle, 2 cousins & myself) waiting for the end.
She all of sudden sat up, open her eyes and smiled the biggest smile staring into the air, she remained that way for almost a minute, she then laid back down, closed her eyes and then shortly afterwards expired. The look on her face was total peace.

I guess she was ready.

Would I tell someone to go to the light, I would tell when they're ready, then go.
Do I believe it happens, I don't know what mom was looking at, but that's been a long time since she smiled and was at peace, believe what you will, for myself, I believe so.

To caveat this:
We spent a week at hospice 24 hours a day, we saw people pass away.
Some were peacefully and some went screaming the most horrible screams.
Read what you will into that also.