[HotDolly]

Lindbergh, Armstrong, Hillary, Columbus, all reckless, stupid, irresponsible monsters who should have just gotten a 9-5 job like everyone else. How dare they seek to push at the limits of human accomplishment. How dare they venture boldly into the dark. How dare they take a chance. What a bunch of ego maniacs.

Well, in order...don't know much about Lindbergh, but I understand he got substantial fame and accompanying money out of what he did so it wasn't all dumb. This girl wouldn't get anything more than appearances on a couple of talk shows.

Armstrong: the race to the moon was one of the most pointless, money-wasting endeavors in human history, a silly little dick-measuring contest with the commies. I've already said as much on here. Armstrong was, however, paid for taking risk, so he's one up on her too.

Hillary: see Lindbergh, only I'm not sure how much he got out of it and he didn't really pave the way for new endeavors like Lindy did with solo transatlantic flight. We'd seen the frozen rock, we'd been around every side of the frozen rock, but now by God we'd been on TOP of the frozen rock! Huzzah!

Columbus: unlike the other three insofar as he was an actual, certifiable moron. He wasn't doing it for the majesty of endeavor, just to open up a new trade route for his own profit. That should make him look less silly, but alas, he was a cretin. The circumference of the globe had been known for over a thousand years to be far greater than he thought it was. He would have died or failed looking for the Indies if he hadn't bumbled across America by accident. And when he did find it, he totally screwed up the management of it. We have a holiday named after this guy to remind the ****ups among us that they, too, can potentially succeed despite any incompetence.