[tearidrusydet]

This creates a very convincing illusion that the dog understood English well enough to follow a complex command. So it's probably beyond most dogs understanding to ask them to bring you a martini, shaken, not stirred?

[maxtp]

Yes, my dog understands a variety of words. Whether or not he chooses to listen... that's another matter.

-Arrian

[NerbuitW]

Yeah, they do get used to associations - all of the dogs I have ever had have got to know the word 'walk' even though they have never explicitly been taught it. It is nothing too surprising, simple Pavlovian association not surprising in a species with highly developed auditory senses.

[Zesavenue]

My parent's dog (I still think of her as mine) is very smart and very obedient. My parents live on a farm and so Daisy is allowed to run free but likes to keep my mother company when my mother goes walking and she's never been on a lease. Daisy is very adept at reading body signals. Since there are no sidewalks they walk on the side of the road. When a car is coming all my mother has to do is point to the line and Daisy will know to stay off the road until the car passes. Daisy also knows what you say by the tone of your voice. If you sound scared she will be very protective. If you speak angrily, she hangs her head like the most repentive of creatures.
I think that most dogs are very smart, especially if their masters take good care of them. However, my parent's neighbors have a dumb little dog that will sit in the middle of the road and watch the cars coming toward it. The dog is so small that cars can't even see it and last night at dusk she was nearly hit twice. She is the dumbest dog I've ever seen.

[6M8PJigS]

Cats just look smart. They aren't really.

[gabbaman]

A guy and his dog are in a bar.
"Hey!" snarls the bartender. "No dogs allowed!"
"But this dog can speak English," says the man.
"Really??" gasps the bartender.
"Sure, watch this: What's the texture of sandpaper?"
Rough.
"And what's up on top of this bar?"
Roof.
"Who's the greatest home run hitter in history?"
Ruth.
The bartender grabs them and tosses them out of the bar.
"You idiot!" the man shouts at his dog.
The dog nods. "Yeah, I should have said Aaron."