[Overlord]

I had my suspicions for sometime that my wife's parents were lax in purchasing meat from a butcher certified by HMC (Halaal Monitoring Committee). The suspicions arose based on takeaways that have been purchased on the odd occasion, which has not been HMC certified. Today, by questioning in a roundabout way, I ascertained that meat was purchased from a butcher, whose certification had been removed. That is not to say that the butcher used is haraam.

Now, if I say to my wife that I will not be eating meat at her parents, based on the fact that this is the 2nd instance that uncertified meat has been purchased, this will result in an emotional outburst comprising 2 points:

1. I am having a go at her parents again (NB: I permit her to point out the wrongs of my parents, so that she can offload, and so when criticism is justified, I will accept. Unfortunately the reverse is not always true).
2. This is why you have waswasa issue, because you delve, and hence I am not accepting your judgement on the matter.

There is the added issue of my in-laws, who are very hospitable, thinking, how dare this 'kid' have the audacity to imply that we are consuming doubtful meat. Relations will be strained, and because I am weak myself, the result will be scrutiny and criticism of my actions, e.g.

"look at him, he didn't pray his Salah with jamat, but he is having a go at us about meat." (Your typical 5-year-old retort).

What is the best way to address the issue?

[Dreqsqse]

I would just speak to her parents and tell them calmly that the meat they are eating isn't halal and explain to them the issue with the butchers certification. Make sure you let them know however that they weren't at fault since they were probably most likely unaware that the meat they are eating isn't halal and everything is about intention and they weren't intending to eat non halal meat. Also maybe do some research and suggest a few halal butchers that are near them so they can find an alternative.

[intisgunkas]

I had my suspicions for sometime that my wife's parents were lax in purchasing meat from a butcher certified by HMC (Halaal Monitoring Committee). The suspicions arose based on takeaways that have been purchased on the odd occasion, which has not been HMC certified. Today, by questioning in a roundabout way, I ascertained that meat was purchased from a butcher, whose certification had been removed. That is not to say that the butcher used is haraam.

Now, if I say to my wife that I will not be eating meat at her parents, based on the fact that this is the 2nd instance that uncertified meat has been purchased, this will result in an emotional outburst comprising 2 points:

1. I am having a go at her parents again (NB: I permit her to point out the wrongs of my parents, so that she can offload, and so when criticism is justified, I will accept. Unfortunately the reverse is not always true).
2. This is why you have waswasa issue, because you delve, and hence I am not accepting your judgement on the matter.

There is the added issue of my in-laws, who are very hospitable, thinking, how dare this 'kid' have the audacity to imply that we are consuming doubtful meat. Relations will be strained, and because I am weak myself, the result will be scrutiny and criticism of my actions, e.g.

"look at him, he didn't pray his Salah with jamat, but he is having a go at us about meat." (Your typical 5-year-old retort).

What is the best way to address the issue?

Just talk to your wife first and once she has understood your point of view. It would be best to then approach the parents of your wife, and talk to them in a decent manner....I'm sure, that it won't turn into such a drama if you approach the matter delicately, (rather than irrationally)

[Overlord]

They are well aware of what they are doing. My wife has told them previously that I only eat certified meat, but they have a carefree attitude that allegedly won't change due to age.

[RooldpalApata]

I had my suspicions for sometime that my wife's parents were lax in purchasing meat from a butcher certified by HMC (Halaal Monitoring Committee). The suspicions arose based on takeaways that have been purchased on the odd occasion, which has not been HMC certified. Today, by questioning in a roundabout way, I ascertained that meat was purchased from a butcher, whose certification had been removed. That is not to say that the butcher used is haraam.

Now, if I say to my wife that I will not be eating meat at her parents, based on the fact that this is the 2nd instance that uncertified meat has been purchased, this will result in an emotional outburst comprising 2 points:

1. I am having a go at her parents again (NB: I permit her to point out the wrongs of my parents, so that she can offload, and so when criticism is justified, I will accept. Unfortunately the reverse is not always true).
2. This is why you have waswasa issue, because you delve, and hence I am not accepting your judgement on the matter.

There is the added issue of my in-laws, who are very hospitable, thinking, how dare this 'kid' have the audacity to imply that we are consuming doubtful meat. Relations will be strained, and because I am weak myself, the result will be scrutiny and criticism of my actions, e.g.

"look at him, he didn't pray his Salah with jamat, but he is having a go at us about meat." (Your typical 5-year-old retort).

What is the best way to address the issue?

First of all, you have to know what you're talking about. Just because a meat is not HMC certified doesn't mean it is not halal. It could be that HMC did not reach that area. Or that the area already is a trustworthy area of meat. It could be many reasons. However, if HMC specifically stated that this meat is not killed in islamic manner, then you can say that according to their opinion it is not halal. Correct me if I'm wrong, but there are differences in opinion on this, but HMC takes the most safest of approaches, hence its high status. I also have no idea what I'm talking about here but I thought I might give you some hint as to how you have to know what you're talking about when you want to talk about it. Once you've established that, then act upon that. If what they're eating is totally haram according to a unanimous decision among the scholars, then you can let them know about it and then it will be their decision. Then say you won't eat because of that decision but speak with hikma.
Salaam

[Overlord]

First of all, you have to know what you're talking about. Just because a meat is not HMC certified doesn't mean it is not halal. It could be that HMC did not reach that area. Or that the area already is a trustworthy area of meat. It could be many reasons. However, if HMC specifically stated that this meat is not killed in islamic manner, then you can say that according to their opinion it is not halal. Correct me if I'm wrong, but there are differences in opinion on this, but HMC takes the most safest of approaches, hence its high status. I also have no idea what I'm talking about here but I thought I might give you some hint as to how you have to know what you're talking about when you want to talk about it. Once you've established that, then act upon that. If what they're eating is totally haram according to a unanimous decision among the scholars, then you can let them know about it and then it will be their decision. Then say you won't eat because of that decision but speak with hikma.
Salaam

I have enquired from HMC why the said butcher's certification has been removed, and I am awaiting a respinse. It is not as simple as Halaal and Haraam. Is there not the category of doubtful?