[Toscoropreark]

As Salamu 'alaykum,
hope few ppl know me in this forum. I am now in India -in my hometown. Came for vacation 2 weeks.

Since i joined the effort of tabligh, I changed. I am now with Sunnah beard and with good discipline. My family doesnt like it.
My maternal and paternal uncles who doesnt pray are forcing me to take the beard off and they are angry that I am involved with Tabligh, moreover I am not indulged in going to movies, watching unwanted TV prog, roaming outside - these things are bothering them. Still people here talk baseless hate stories of pakistan & they are telling me that having beard and following 100% islam should be in afghanistan and saudi.

They are asking me to get married. My opinion is
1. there is no deen in my house. the girl's and my life would get spoiled.
2. Elders have said me to get married after going for 4 months jammat. - InshaAllah, I think this ll make a change. I didnt discussed with my family. If i tell this, my uncle would definitely hit my local hometown amir.
please advice. thanks.

only my dad supports me in matters of deen.
IS IT BAD TO FOLLOW THE SUNNAH AND STAY IN DEEN????

[zoolissentesy]

As Salamu 'alaykum,

They are asking me to get married. My opinion is
1. there is no deen in my house. the girl's and my life would get screwed.

Bro, don't make conclusions already that your life will be screwed up. That having a bad opinion of Allah Ta'ala. Be steadfast, Allah Ta'ala will show you the way.

Have you heard about 'ghuraba'.

[Qeiafib]

As Salamu 'alaykum,
hope few ppl know me in this forum. I am now in India -in my hometown. Came for vacation 2 weeks.

Since i joined the effort of tabligh, I changed. I am now with Sunnah beard and with good discipline. My family doesnt like it.
My maternal and paternal uncles who doesnt pray are forcing me to take the beard off and they are angry that I am involved with Tabligh, moreover I am not indulged in going to movies, watching unwanted TV prog, roaming outside - these things are bothering them. Still people here talk baseless hate stories of pakistan & they are telling me that having beard and following 100% islam should be in afghanistan and saudi.

They are asking me to get married. My opinion is
1. there is no deen in my house. the girl's and my life would get screwed.
2. Elders have said me to get married after going for 4 months jammat. - InshaAllah, I think this ll make a change. I didnt discussed with my family. If i tell this, my uncle would definitely hit my local hometown amir.
please advice. thanks.

only my dad supports me in matters of deen.
IS IT BAD TO FOLLOW THE SUNNAH AND STAY IN DEEN????

At least your father supports your efforts, may Allah bless him. For some, even the father is pressuring them to shave or trim the beard. As for your uncles, you don't have to obey them, especially not when they are opposing the shariah. It doesn't matter what they think.

Getting married...you need to find a girl who is as committed to the deen as you. Do not let your non-practicing family choose the girl. Since you live in the US, why not look for a wife who lives here as well?

You are only there for two weeks, so don't be hasty and make a decision you will regret later on. Once you come back, the pressure from your family will be off and you can make the right choice.

[shanice]

SubhanAllah, its an excellent opportunity for you to give Dawah where its most needed and from where you will extract the maximum rewards from Allah (swt). I am not sure where you are based in India, but from the place (North India) I belong though not everyone has Sunnah beard but Tabligh work is not frowned upon. But I can understand your situation, you must not get upset and try and use hikmah and patience while dealing with them, surely with time they will see a change in you, and their attitude towards you will change as well.

However, if you can afford to get married then do not wait. If there is suitable proposal from a pious girl, then go for it, though you must go on 4 months later sometime. Even if you don't find a pious girl in line, you can explain your outlook of life and what you expect from it and how you would like to spend the rest of you life to any cadidate your parents/family have lined up for you. If the girl is too modern she would any way run away from you just by your looks. Finally do istikharah.

[mashabox]

That word is very offensive - please use the word spoiled instead.

[Toscoropreark]

SubhanAllah, its an excellent opportunity for you to give Dawah where its most needed and from where you will extract the maximum rewards from Allah (swt). I am not sure where you are based in India, but from the place (North India) I belong though not everyone has Sunnah beard but Tabligh work is not frowned upon. But I can understand your situation, you must not get upset and try and use hikmah and patience while dealing with them, surely with time they will see a change in you, and their attitude towards you will change as well.

However, if you can afford to get married then do not wait. If there is suitable proposal from a pious girl, then go for it, though you must go on 4 months later sometime. Even if you don't find a pious girl in line, you can explain your outlook of life and what you expect from it and how you would like to spend the rest of you life to any cadidate your parents/family have lined up for you. If the girl is too modern she would any way run away from you just by your looks. Finally do istikharah.

pondicherry..
thanks brother for ur advice

[Toscoropreark]

Bro, don't make conclusions already that your life will be screwed up. That having a bad opinion of Allah Ta'ala. Be steadfast, Allah Ta'ala will show you the way.

Have you heard about 'ghuraba'.

thnx brother...insha allah ll take ur advice

[ethigSmimbine]

This video goes perfectly with what your experiencing . Take care
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALy9y...eature=related

[Toscoropreark]

At least your father supports your efforts, may Allah bless him. For some, even the father is pressuring them to shave or trim the beard. As for your uncles, you don't have to obey them, especially not when they are opposing the shariah. It doesn't matter what they think.

Getting married...you need to find a girl who is as committed to the deen as you. Do not let your non-practicing family choose the girl. Since you live in the US, why not look for a wife who lives here as well?

You are only there for two weeks, so don't be hasty and make a decision you will regret later on. Once you come back, the pressure from your family will be off and you can make the right choice.

Insha Allah thanx brother, yesterday night i was crying to my parents that why ppl are trying to push me away from deen.
Today after fajr, my Dad was crying and making dua for me - he was very much worried that why ppl are troubling if one person has to follow the deen in a proper way.

I ll take ur advice brother, I wont listen to anyone who talks outside Shariah.
Regd. my marriage - I like ur advice, May Allah bless u

[Toscoropreark]

@Br. zahed73

thanks for the video it matches exactly..

[viagraman]

When a person tries to become closer to Allah Ta'aala, more often that not, it's one's own family that will bring forth the hurdles. I've seen this happen to my parents and husband. When Rasulullah openly called the Quraysh to Islam, it was his own Uncle who rejected him first.

You just have to stay strong and on your principles. It is impossible that Allah Ta'aala will forsake the one who is trying to get close to Him.

[gerturiotf]

My maternal and paternal uncles who doesnt pray are forcing me to take the beard off and they are angry that I am involved with Tabligh, moreover I am not indulged in going to movies, watching unwanted TV prog, roaming outside - these things are bothering them.

I fear the wrath of Allah for your uncles, my brother and you should too. May Allah make you a means of guidance for them through your sabr and good manners. I heard Hadrat Mawlana Yunus Punawale. rah. (former Amir of Maharashtra) in a bayan say that when he was a young kid in the studying phase, he had an uncle who used to take interest (sood) and was non-practicing. This uncle had a cupboard full of money and gold. He further said, "As young kids we used to run to him and ask him why he did not pray and follow the Sunna and he used to shoo us away".
And then he said, "I have seen with my own eyes that uncle of mine sitting by the side of the road, begging for alms".
May Allah protect all of us.

[mashabox]

Assalamu alaykum

I had started growing the beard, my uncle who returned from gulf, on my first meeting shouted at me. "GO AND SHAVE THE BEARD, ARE YOU NOT A MUSLIM WITHOUT A BEARD. GO AND SEE THE GULF". My reply was silence (not a single word).

Everything improved for me, Alhamdulillah both duniya and deen. But the uncle. I should pray for him.

It is clear what role Gulf is playing in Dawah.

It is very curious to know that just because Elijah Muhammed adopted the terminology of beloved Prophet(PBUH) his followers later on ended up in Islam. At the same time those who are adopting the terminology of Taghoot are ending where they are ending. And they are not ending at a good place in this world. For hereafter Allah(SWT) knows best.

[alexosnasos2]

May Allah SWT ease your troubles, amen.

I concur with what bro transitory said. Try to make them understand, or just stay silent, you are here only for some time.

When we made our bro (he is studying ifta now at deoband) join the Hifz course about a decade ago, almost everyone opposed, some relatives didn't give two hoots, some uncles and aunts said 'what will he do becoming a hafiz', almost everyone even seniors discouraged my parents, some even strongly, we had to go through this even when he got into the aalimiyatt, even neighbours didn't appreciate, except for the local senior tablighi zimmedaar (who is now no more, may Allah SWT fill his grave with immense Noor & grant him Jannat ul Firdaus) who gave us immense emotional support and encouraged my parents and esp. my bro and one Ulema (who is now the khalifa of Ml Zulfiqar Saheb db) who encouraged my bro in his early years of aalimiyatt, if not for them (of-course it was Allah SWT helping us through them), I don't think my bro would be where he is today.

Today, everyone has fallen in line, everyone who opposed have fallen silent (not dead) and realize what it means to have a Scholar in their midst. You see, no one in our family or relatives has ever even been a Hafiz, forget an Aalim, or a Mufti.

Until Tabligh happened.

So, pray for steadfastness.
I also very strongly suggest you leave in khurooj for 4 months before getting married, post marriage, it gets a little tough.

[Toscoropreark]

Assalamu alaykum

I had started growing the beard, my uncle who returned from gulf, on my first meeting shouted at me. "GO AND SHAVE THE BEARD, ARE YOU NOT A MUSLIM WITHOUT A BEARD. GO AND SEE THE GULF". My reply was silence (not a single word).

Everything improved for me, Alhamdulillah both duniya and deen. But the uncle. I should pray for him.

even I am getting same reply from some people that Saudis have trimmed beard why you cant?