[Qxkmsxsx]

Assalamoalaikum.
In my house, i have 2 sisters and things have been sharp with them these days. I have not talked with them for the past 7 months and now i am beginning to wonder whether i am committing a sin, but it's not my fault is it? They have betrayed me and taken me all too granted. They do not respect me and they are extremely nosy too, peeking around, trying to read my diary. They have never treated me like a brother, but rather like a toy, to be used when needed and thrown away when they don't want it. I have tried to make them a bit more spiritual but they have never listened to me. They have been doing this for a very ;long time but i have forgiven them an gave them second chances but now i have had enough of their attitude. I wont tolerate it any more. The point of all this is whether i am sinning when shunning my sisters. As far as my judgement extends, i am not because they are the one who have wronged me not the other way round. Looking forward to your replies.
Thank you.

[GetsTan]

Maintaining family ties is extremely important in Islam, and breaking ties with family indeed constitutes as sin. Vice versa, joining ties together with estranged family members is more rewarding that nafl salaah, fasting or sadaqah.

You should try to ignore the way your siblings treat you and reciprocate in the best manner possible to them for the sake of Allah Ta'aala, and you will be rewarded by Allah Ta'aala greatly.

[Wymdqcvb]

Brother... sister Sudoku is right and I too struggle with this.

Here is an article a sister shared on her blog, it is an excellent reminder and I think you will benefit from reading it too: http://alhaadi.org.za/component/cont...fferently.html

[Liabmeasez]

How old are you? So they read your diary, eh? I think you need to turn the tables and play some friendly pranks on them.

[Clesylafabada]

I think you need to turn the tables and play some friendly pranks on them.

Exactly.
Sometimes being ''sweet'' back just does the trick. But like the others say, you need to start talking to them again.

[Worseacar]

They are being women!! They can't help nosying around!! they say one thing, we bro undestand differnt thing. They talk of dinner, we think of pilow rice : ).

[diutuartina]

They are being women!! They can't help nosying around!! they say one thing, we bro undestand differnt thing. They talk of dinner, we think of pilow rice : ).

ASWW
a..a..a..a?!! Brother what in the world do you mean... being women?... nosing around??... eh??
and dont pillow rice coz thats my favourite favourite!!

[phsyalcvqh]

Shunning them won't make any difference, its not like they will treat you any better that way. You're better off speaking to them and being kind to them but most of all, make dua for them as guidance only comes from Allah azza wajal, it is only your duty to try, whether they listen to you or not is in the hands of Allah. And Allahu Alam, they may be very spiritual deep down so don't get so worried about it.

If they're so nosy, its because they sincerely and truly care for you and take note that they're not perfect. You have to look beyond their imperfections and continue to maintain good relations (as sister sudoku said).

[Edwardthe_third]

My little brother: Don’t rely on them or your kindness to make the relationship work but rather rely on Allah SWT. Only expect Allah SWT to appreciate your good treatment of them and trust that He SWT will make the relationship a God-pleasing one if you endure the bitterness of showing kindness when you’d rather do otherwise. We must also believe that only He SWT has the power to make them reciprocate your love and care which He SWT will insha Allah ta’aala make them do if you try your best to be sincere in your desire to have a God-pleasing relationship with them. This is the mentality I try apply in my relationships, especially the difficult ones, and it works beautifully. Barak Allah ta’aala my little brother and insha Allah ta’aala you and your sisters will have an extremely warm, beautiful, and Allah SWT pleasing relationship. Don’t ever think that’s not achievable because it absolutely is. Barak Allah ta’aala.

[Senasivar]

Stop being a soft touch.

Show them you can laugh with them too. Do they apply hair colour? why not buy some blue and then switch them. It will bring a smile on all your faces inshaAllah.

[Wymdqcvb]

(Sounds like a set up to me - blue hair dye might just equal a few blue marks of pain... just saying.)

[salomal-qask]

Just overlook the wrong they do and continue being the "big brother" you are. 7 months is a long time not to be speaking to them!!

Keep this hadith in mind ....

The Messenger said, “Whoever has three daughters or three sisters, cares for them and disciplines them, he and I shall be like this is in Paradise” – as he was putting his index and middle fingers together.”

All siblings tease each other and argue at some point , we shouldn't let it become a big deal where it disunites us. If they nosy around why don't u lock the stuff you don't want them to see in a drawer or something. Explain to them that it's not right to snoop around in people belongings. Have your parents talk to them. How old are they anyway?

[Qxkmsxsx]

yes, i think you are all saying the correct thing. I should restart the relationship with them. But it will be very difficult

[GetsTan]

You definitely should restart your relationship with them.

And yes, it may be difficult, but the end results are worth it.

[Clesylafabada]

..nice advice from both mods.

i just would like to add..whenver such situations happen and u want to forget the past then..start ur fresh day with salaam..now every morning say salaam to ur sis. this will soften their hearts..and u will find them very friendly.....

try this if u feel like it as this is just sfer's opinion..

Yes thats a great way of mending broken relationships (especially between sibling's)....

Tho to be honest, it's easier saying the salaam in a teasing way (not offensive but just funny), something which will make the person laugh and sort of ''break the ice.''

I could give u examples... but i duno what your sister's find funny!

[HcMkOKiz]

You'll realize their worth once they get married and leave home I know how I miss my sister

[Clesylafabada]

You'll realize their worth once they get married and leave home I know how I miss my sister

So true!

Btw its not abnormal or anything extraordinary to have bust-ups with your sisters occasionally. All sibling's do - and if they don't, then its abnormal!!!
But the thing is to fix it up when it happens instead of letting it get worse. I can't imagine living in one house and not talking to my siblings for more than seven hours - even if its just to remind them how upset i am and how i disagree!

[voksveta]

if you know they read your diary why not pour your heart out and write your feelings. only write positive things and how you miss them and you want to turn back time. talk of how lucky you are to have them but you'd be luckier and happier if they were more spiritual.

dude trust me youll regret not talking to them. imagine i came to you and advised you to do something which is alien to you, you'd most likely rebel. aint nobody going to become junaid baghdadi over night so dont expect it. slowly and with hikmah advise them about the deen.

[Clesylafabada]

if you know they read your diary why not pour your heart out and write your feelings. only write positive things and how you miss them and you want to turn back time. talk of how lucky you are to have them but you'd be luckier and happier if they were more spiritual.

dude trust me youll regret it.

That's a SUPER-GREAT idea!

[seodiary]

L hamdoullilah of my sisters after reading this topic.

I remembered this aya: لَا يُكَلِّفُ اللَّهُ نَفْسًا إِلَّا وُسْعَهَا لَهَا مَا كَسَبَتْ وَعَلَيْهَا مَا اكْتَسَبَتْ .
think about it, God gave you the solution in someway that only you know how to deal with it, try to do something that they love someone to do it for them , keep doing it just for the sake that they become happy.

Dude you may enter jannah just because you helped your sisters on dunya, so DONT WASTE THAT OPPORTUNITY.