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Old 02-14-2012, 07:16 PM   #1
Rnlvifov

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Oct 2005
Posts
433
Senior Member
Default Disobaying your mother is a grave sin-which is why I'm worried
Peace,

I am aware of the importance of the mother in Islam, but unfortunately I am in a situation where my mother is suffering from high blood pressure and persistently takes out her anger on her children for vast periods of time throughout the day.

It's not her fault at all, her mum has recently passed away, but it's very unpleasant for us as her sons.

During periods of stress, she often gives out extremely difficult demands which are the things you would say only in a time of anger and frustration.

I don't want to be accused of ignorance or arrogance or disobeying my parents on the day of judgement, but my relationship is virtually in tatters with my mother, I can't stand it.

Could the brothers and sisters on here offer me some advice?
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Old 02-14-2012, 07:21 PM   #2
Amoniustauns

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Nov 2005
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395
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ASWW
I wish I had a difficult mother like yours then I would be given a higher abode in Jannah than you brother. ... Ah well... you cant win em all...
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Old 02-14-2012, 07:36 PM   #3
Pete789

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Oct 2005
Posts
536
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Default
Peace,

I am aware of the importance of the mother in Islam, but unfortunately I am in a situation where my mother is suffering from high blood pressure and persistently takes out her anger on her children for vast periods of time throughout the day.

It's not her fault at all, her mum has recently passed away, but it's very unpleasant for us as her sons.

During periods of stress, she often gives out extremely difficult demands which are the things you would say only in a time of anger and frustration.

I don't want to be accused of ignorance or arrogance or disobeying my parents on the day of judgement, but my relationship is virtually in tatters with my mother, I can't stand it.

Could the brothers and sisters on here offer me some advice?

My father died two years back. So mother also is under some stress and gets angry too(not very often). I m very bad at dealing this, most often i screw things myself, but there are some things that really works.
1) Don't talk back or argue back even if her arguement has no base. ( I haven't mastered this yet, InshaAllah one day....)
2) After she is cooled, crack some silly jokes to defuse the tension. Also hold her hand and show some affection. Acting silly like a kid, really helps Eg: calling her what we used to call when we were young, like ummmiiiiieeee, with the elongation.(I m dead serious here)
3) At the time of anger Recite Auzhubillah and Ayatul kursi.
4) The Most Important: Patience and lots and lots of Dua
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