[GogaMegaPis]

Salam alikum sister,
can not you ask your family to find you husband?

w salam

[GtmFeqJJ]

Again in an ideal world that would be the case. But as sad as it seems we don't live in an ideal world. My cousin wanted to marry an Arab guy but both families refused to acknowledge the marriage, so there's nothing left but to decide between family or guy/girl. Any reasonable person would go for the family even if they family is in the wrong.

Bismillah
I personally feel it also goes with compatibility too and if one wants to choose based on that, there is nothing wrong in it without having hatred for other cultures in the heart. Allahu alam

[STYWOMBORGOSY]

Again in an ideal world that would be the case. But as sad as it seems we don't live in an ideal world. My cousin wanted to marry an Arab guy but both families refused to acknowledge the marriage, so there's nothing left but to decide between family or guy/girl. Any reasonable person would go for the family even if they family is in the wrong.

I think some of the brothers/sisters are trying to say is that at least in your heart you should accept a mate that is not part of your tribe/culture. If your parents do not approve then that is their business, but as far as you are concerned it should remain a possibility. If your heart is closed to outsiders than their is no chance for getting married to outside the tribe, if your heart is open maybe Allah (swt) will bless you with a pious husband not from your culture. The main objective is to get married to a good man, not a good somali man.

[GtmFeqJJ]

Bismillah
Can a non arab muslim man (ajami) marry an arab muslim girl

I read in a book ( I think reliance of the traveller ) than non arab cannot marry an arab , since arabs are choosen people ,its little confusing please explain .
Kindly refer below our standard reply to similar queries.

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
FATWA DEPT.

KAFA'AH (SUITABILITY AND COMPATIBILITY) IN NIKAH

A healthy marital life coupled with a good relationship make up the prime
objects of Nikah. That is only possible when natural inclinations and
backgrounds are shared (by both spouses). In the absence of such unity,
living together successfully, despite great effort is indeed difficult, as
attested to by many marital breakdowns due to non-compatibility.

Certain actions and situations elicit different responses from persons of
differing backgrounds and nature. For this reason, the Shari'ah has
considered Kafaa'at (suitability and compatibility) between spouses
necessary.

Kafaa'at in Lineage

Due to the above, the Fuqahaa (Jurists) have stated that among Arabs, a
non-Quraishi male is not a match (Kuf) for a Quraishi woman, nor can any
person of non-Arab descent be a match for a woman of Arab descent.

For example, the Sayyids, whether Siddique or Farooque, Uthmaani or Alawi,
or belonging to some other branch can never be matched by any person not
sharing their lineage, no matter his profession and family status. These
families (Sayyids, etc.) are suitable matches for one another, since they
share descent from the Quraishi tribe. Thus, marriages between themselves
are correct and permitted without any condition as appearing in Darrul
Mukhtaar:

'. And Kafaa'at in lineage. Thus the Quraysh are suitable matches for one
another as are the (other) Arabs suitable matches for one another.'

The ruling relevant to non-Arabs is as follows: 'An Ajmi (non-Arab) cannot
be a match for a woman of Arab descent, no matter that he be an Aalim
(religious scholar) or even a Sultan (ruling authority). This is the correct
view.)

Kafaat in Profession

Among Arabs, Kaf'aat with regards to professions is not considered since
such does not usually form a basis for respectability in their society.
Rather, all professions are regarded equal. A person of a certain profession
does not usually regard another as of lower in status. This is contrary to
the practise of non-Arabs who consider professions as status in their
society. Professions are accorded different levels in status and on this
basis, association of a person of superior profession with another of a
lesser degree is regarded as difficult. It is for this reason the noble
Shari'ah has taken Kafa'aat into consideration in worldly dealings (although
in the sight of Allah, such things are no measure of superiority or
inferiority).

Thus, the Fuqahaa (jurists) have stated that a weaver is not a Kufu' (match)
of a tailor, rather he is inferior nor is a tailor the Kufu' of a cloth
merchant nor a cloth merchant the Kufu' of an Aalim (scholar of Deen) or
Qadhi (judge of an Islamic court). (Darrul Mukhtaar vol.3 pg.90; MH Sa'eed)

The Ruling Regarding Consideration of Kafa'aat Being Necessary

It is the saying of Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam), 'Listen! Women
should be married off only by their (Shar'ee) guardians (Wali) and their
marriage should take place only with suitable matches.' (Akfaa).'
(Daaraqutni and Bayhaqi)

It is most suitable for a woman's Nikah to be contracted by her Wali (Shar'
ee guardian) - So that she is not deceived due to inexperience and ignorance
and that she remain safe from the destructive reins of desires. Also that
she, as far as possible, be married to a Kufu' (so she remains protected
from the distress and incompatibility of marriage to a non-Kufu')

Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, 'Oh Ali (Radhiallaahu Anhu)! Never
delay in 3 matters; Salaat - when it's time is nigh; Janaaza - when it is
ready (before you), an unmarried woman - when her Kufu' (suitable partner)
is found.' (Tirmidhi)

Three things should never be delayed without valid Shar'ee excuse: a)
Salaat - when its Mustahabb time has set in. b) Janaaza - When the bier is
ready, and c) an unmarried woman - when a Kufu' is found.

Another saying of Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam), 'Choose carefully for
your seed. Marry suitable (Akfaa) woman and marry off (your females) to them
(Akfaa).'

Seek suitable women in marriage. Get married to Akfaa and get your females
married off to Akfaa as well (a similar narration comes from Aaisha
(Radhiallaahu Anha)

Is Marriage with a non-Kufu' invalid in all circumstances

The answer to this question is that Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) has
advised the Shar'ee guardians of a female to consider her best interests
from all angles. Consideration of Kafaa'at is part of this, and her due
right. Nevertheless, it is right of the guardians as well. Just as a female
may experience shame, incompatibility and disunity by marriage to a non-Kufu
', her guardians also share the same experience. Furthermore, in the case of
disagreement, they are inconvenienced and suffer greatly. Due to this, if a
sane, Baaligh (one who has reached the age of maturity) female marries a
non-Kufu' without the permission of her guardian, according to the adopted
view, the Nikah is void and invalid. (Darrul Mukhtaar and Shaami).

Similarly, if any guardian has the Nikah of a non-Baaligh female performed
with a non-Kufu', it is also void and invalid. However, if the guardian (in
question) is the father or paternal grandfather who marries the non-Baaligh
female to a non-Kufu', the Nikah is valid and binding. The affection and
kindness of a father or grandfather, being as it is, demands that dispensing
with Kafaa'at was not done without consideration of some other greater
benefit. Ill-will is definitely not the reason.

If a sane Baaligh female herself consents to marriage with a non-Kufu', and
her guardians as well, the Nikah will be valid and correct, even though it
is unsuitable in consideration of future benefits (as appears in Hidaaya and
most other reference works).

Reply to One Misconception

This (above) also clarifies the misconception that with regards to
non-Arabs, the Fuqahaa (Jurists) have considered a new Muslim as non-Kufu'
of one who is Qadeemul Islam (old Muslim). By this, it seems that new
Muslims are unable to marry, since they are non-Kufu' to those who are
Qadeemul Islam (old Muslim). The answer is apparent, that there is no
general prohibition in marriage to a non-Kuf', rather the condition is that
both the female as well as her guardian grant her consent. Concerning the
marriage of new Muslims, it should be borne in mind that no shame should be
attached to this. Marriage with them should be done happily and without
reservation.

A Point of Note

One thing should always be borne in mind regarding new Muslim and Nikah. His
adherence to Islam should be clear and his sincerity and firmness upon Islam
should be apparent from his dealings. Until such is not established, it is
not suitable for one to advance or go ahead with the Nikah since this could
lead to problems.

Final Note

Superiority and virtue, worldly or otherwise are always of two kinds.

1) Ikhtiyaar (by choice) - that which a human being can earn or attain by
his own endeavour.

2) Non-Ikhtiyaar (opp of 1) - which is not the outcome of any effort or
endeavour, nor can it be attained by one's own striving.

An intelligent one is he who continues to strive in attaining the first kind
and never loses courage in doing so. Pursuing attainment of the second kind
(non-Ikhtiyaari) is a complete abandonment of intelligence and nothing but a
waste of time.

The purpose of our discussion is to point out that nobility in lineage is
among these non-Ikhtiyaari virtue. This same rule applies here that one so
honoured regard it a divine favour and express gratitude thereof while one
not so blessed, not engage in pursuit of it thinking that such is better for
himself. How can one know whether he will be able to fulfil therights of
such upon attainment thereof?

Therefore, strive and work to attain the Ikhtiyaari, the actual real, virtue
and an everlasting treasure by which one attains a far greater status in the
sight of Allah than those of noble lineage.

Jawaahirul Fiqh vol.2 pg.95; Maktaba Darul Uloom
http://www.islam.tc/cgi-bin/askimam/...=6225&act=view

[23tommy]

I think some of the brothers/sisters are trying to say is that at least in your heart you should accept a mate that is not part of your tribe/culture. If your parents do not approve then that is their business, but as far as you are concerned it should remain a possibility. If your heart is closed to outsiders than their is no chance for getting married to outside the tribe, if your heart is open maybe Allah (swt) will bless you with a pious husband not from your culture. The main objective is to get married to a good man, not a good somali man.

I'm sorry but this is easier said than done. You can't just abandon your family just because you want to marry someone from a different race. Family was there for you all your life. You can't also erase the stigma in our society. I wish we could but we can't. It's time for reality to hit home.

[23tommy]

Bismillah
Can a non arab muslim man (ajami) marry an arab muslim girl

I read in a book ( I think reliance of the traveller ) than non arab cannot marry an arab , since arabs are choosen people ,its little confusing please explain .
Kindly refer below our standard reply to similar queries.

and Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
FATWA DEPT.

KAFA'AH (SUITABILITY AND COMPATIBILITY) IN NIKAH

A healthy marital life coupled with a good relationship make up the prime
objects of Nikah. That is only possible when natural inclinations and
backgrounds are shared (by both spouses). In the absence of such unity,
living together successfully, despite great effort is indeed difficult, as
attested to by many marital breakdowns due to non-compatibility.

Certain actions and situations elicit different responses from persons of
differing backgrounds and nature. For this reason, the Shari'ah has
considered Kafaa'at (suitability and compatibility) between spouses
necessary.

Kafaa'at in Lineage

Due to the above, the Fuqahaa (Jurists) have stated that among Arabs, a
non-Quraishi male is not a match (Kuf) for a Quraishi woman, nor can any
person of non-Arab descent be a match for a woman of Arab descent.

For example, the Sayyids, whether Siddique or Farooque, Uthmaani or Alawi,
or belonging to some other branch can never be matched by any person not
sharing their lineage, no matter his profession and family status. These
families (Sayyids, etc.) are suitable matches for one another, since they
share descent from the Quraishi tribe. Thus, marriages between themselves
are correct and permitted without any condition as appearing in Darrul
Mukhtaar:

'. And Kafaa'at in lineage. Thus the Quraysh are suitable matches for one
another as are the (other) Arabs suitable matches for one another.'

The ruling relevant to non-Arabs is as follows: 'An Ajmi (non-Arab) cannot
be a match for a woman of Arab descent, no matter that he be an Aalim
(religious scholar) or even a Sultan (ruling authority). This is the correct
view.)

Kafaat in Profession

Among Arabs, Kaf'aat with regards to professions is not considered since
such does not usually form a basis for respectability in their society.
Rather, all professions are regarded equal. A person of a certain profession
does not usually regard another as of lower in status. This is contrary to
the practise of non-Arabs who consider professions as status in their
society. Professions are accorded different levels in status and on this
basis, association of a person of superior profession with another of a
lesser degree is regarded as difficult. It is for this reason the noble
Shari'ah has taken Kafa'aat into consideration in worldly dealings (although
in the sight of Allah, such things are no measure of superiority or
inferiority).

Thus, the Fuqahaa (jurists) have stated that a weaver is not a Kufu' (match)
of a tailor, rather he is inferior nor is a tailor the Kufu' of a cloth
merchant nor a cloth merchant the Kufu' of an Aalim (scholar of Deen) or
Qadhi (judge of an Islamic court). (Darrul Mukhtaar vol.3 pg.90; MH Sa'eed)

The Ruling Regarding Consideration of Kafa'aat Being Necessary

It is the saying of Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam), 'Listen! Women
should be married off only by their (Shar'ee) guardians (Wali) and their
marriage should take place only with suitable matches.' (Akfaa).'
(Daaraqutni and Bayhaqi)

It is most suitable for a woman's Nikah to be contracted by her Wali (Shar'
ee guardian) - So that she is not deceived due to inexperience and ignorance
and that she remain safe from the destructive reins of desires. Also that
she, as far as possible, be married to a Kufu' (so she remains protected
from the distress and incompatibility of marriage to a non-Kufu')

Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) said, 'Oh Ali (Radhiallaahu Anhu)! Never
delay in 3 matters; Salaat - when it's time is nigh; Janaaza - when it is
ready (before you), an unmarried woman - when her Kufu' (suitable partner)
is found.' (Tirmidhi)

Three things should never be delayed without valid Shar'ee excuse: a)
Salaat - when its Mustahabb time has set in. b) Janaaza - When the bier is
ready, and c) an unmarried woman - when a Kufu' is found.

Another saying of Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam), 'Choose carefully for
your seed. Marry suitable (Akfaa) woman and marry off (your females) to them
(Akfaa).'

Seek suitable women in marriage. Get married to Akfaa and get your females
married off to Akfaa as well (a similar narration comes from Aaisha
(Radhiallaahu Anha)

Is Marriage with a non-Kufu' invalid in all circumstances

The answer to this question is that Nabi (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) has
advised the Shar'ee guardians of a female to consider her best interests
from all angles. Consideration of Kafaa'at is part of this, and her due
right. Nevertheless, it is right of the guardians as well. Just as a female
may experience shame, incompatibility and disunity by marriage to a non-Kufu
', her guardians also share the same experience. Furthermore, in the case of
disagreement, they are inconvenienced and suffer greatly. Due to this, if a
sane, Baaligh (one who has reached the age of maturity) female marries a
non-Kufu' without the permission of her guardian, according to the adopted
view, the Nikah is void and invalid. (Darrul Mukhtaar and Shaami).

Similarly, if any guardian has the Nikah of a non-Baaligh female performed
with a non-Kufu', it is also void and invalid. However, if the guardian (in
question) is the father or paternal grandfather who marries the non-Baaligh
female to a non-Kufu', the Nikah is valid and binding. The affection and
kindness of a father or grandfather, being as it is, demands that dispensing
with Kafaa'at was not done without consideration of some other greater
benefit. Ill-will is definitely not the reason.

If a sane Baaligh female herself consents to marriage with a non-Kufu', and
her guardians as well, the Nikah will be valid and correct, even though it
is unsuitable in consideration of future benefits (as appears in Hidaaya and
most other reference works).

Reply to One Misconception

This (above) also clarifies the misconception that with regards to
non-Arabs, the Fuqahaa (Jurists) have considered a new Muslim as non-Kufu'
of one who is Qadeemul Islam (old Muslim). By this, it seems that new
Muslims are unable to marry, since they are non-Kufu' to those who are
Qadeemul Islam (old Muslim). The answer is apparent, that there is no
general prohibition in marriage to a non-Kuf', rather the condition is that
both the female as well as her guardian grant her consent. Concerning the
marriage of new Muslims, it should be borne in mind that no shame should be
attached to this. Marriage with them should be done happily and without
reservation.

A Point of Note

One thing should always be borne in mind regarding new Muslim and Nikah. His
adherence to Islam should be clear and his sincerity and firmness upon Islam
should be apparent from his dealings. Until such is not established, it is
not suitable for one to advance or go ahead with the Nikah since this could
lead to problems.

Final Note

Superiority and virtue, worldly or otherwise are always of two kinds.

1) Ikhtiyaar (by choice) - that which a human being can earn or attain by
his own endeavour.

2) Non-Ikhtiyaar (opp of 1) - which is not the outcome of any effort or
endeavour, nor can it be attained by one's own striving.

An intelligent one is he who continues to strive in attaining the first kind
and never loses courage in doing so. Pursuing attainment of the second kind
(non-Ikhtiyaari) is a complete abandonment of intelligence and nothing but a
waste of time.

The purpose of our discussion is to point out that nobility in lineage is
among these non-Ikhtiyaari virtue. This same rule applies here that one so
honoured regard it a divine favour and express gratitude thereof while one
not so blessed, not engage in pursuit of it thinking that such is better for
himself. How can one know whether he will be able to fulfil therights of
such upon attainment thereof?

Therefore, strive and work to attain the Ikhtiyaari, the actual real, virtue
and an everlasting treasure by which one attains a far greater status in the
sight of Allah than those of noble lineage.

Jawaahirul Fiqh vol.2 pg.95; Maktaba Darul Uloom
http://www.islam.tc/cgi-bin/askimam/...=6225&act=view

Sorry maybe I got something wrong here, but are you saying Arabs are a superior race? Correct me if I'm wrong but what do you mean by 'chosen people'? You mean Allah chose them? I swear wherever us closer to Allah is the better person not which community one belongs to!

[w3QHxwNb]

I'm sorry but this is easier said than done. You can't just abandon your family just because you want to marry someone from a different race. Family was there for you all your life. You can't also erase the stigma in our society. I wish we could but we can't. It's time for reality to hit home.

We can always try and change society, the only time we fail is when WE ourselves don't want it to change.

[GtmFeqJJ]

Sorry maybe I got something wrong here, but are you saying Arabs are a superior race? Correct me if I'm wrong but what do you mean by 'chosen people'? You mean Allah chose them? I swear wherever us closer to Allah is the better person not which community one belongs to!

Bismillah
Well i didnt say that sister. That was from the scholar of askimam and I think he stresses on compatibility. I feel ke there is nothing wrong in rejecting proposal based on compatibility. Like if i am from UK and there are people from some other countries brought up there, I would feel bit compatible marrying any one of them as we might have some compatibility rather than marrying someone directly from their home countries as the brought up will be different but this may not be true all the time for some people do live. Allahu alam.
As far as the fatwa I posted, only scholars can clarify.

[23tommy]

We can always try and change society, the only time we fail is when WE ourselves don't want it to change.

Some things are not worth trying. Cultural values & beliefs are rock solid no way to overcome that. You and I both know that this is next to never - as a matter of fact impossible.

[GtmFeqJJ]

Some things are not worth trying. Cultural values & beliefs are rock solid no way to overcome that. You and I both know that this is next to never - as a matter of fact impossible.

Bismillah
Actually if you want to change it and you come to that conclusion having solid reasons, you can convince your parents Allah willing. Anyway we do have to respect the parents too and try to convince them in their own way and for sure they care and wish best for us.

[23tommy]

Bismillah
Well i didnt say that sister. That was from the scholar of askimam and I think he stresses on compatibility. I feel ke there is nothing wrong in rejecting proposal based on compatibility. Like if i am from UK and there are people from some other countries brought up there, I would feel bit compatible marrying any one of them as we might have some compatibility rather than marrying someone directly from their home countries as the brought up will be different but this may not be true all the time for some people do live. Allahu alam.
As far as the fatwa I posted, only scholars can clarify.

Sis no matter where you live in the world Your roots & cultural values always shape your character and attitude towards societal expectations. As I said earlier as well, irrespective of whether or not you are open minded towards marrying other races, your family will always be the biggest burden on your marriage.

[Drugmachine]

Some things are not worth trying. Cultural values & beliefs are rock solid no way to overcome that. You and I both know that this is next to never - as a matter of fact impossible.

1. I perfomed a Nikah last night of two people from two separate cultures
2. I organised a 2nd one for tomorrow of two people from two separate cultures
3. Working on a 3rd one in 2-3 weeks of two people from two separate cultures. This Sister went to her brother and said, "I am Muslim and he is Muslim and I have a right to marry him but I don't want to dissapoint the family but if you force me I WILL MARRY HIM"

Therefore, I am Sorry and I don't see your point.

[23tommy]

[*] I perfomed a Nikah last night of two people from two separate cultures[*] I organised a 2nd one for tomorrow of two people from two separate cultures[*] Working on a 3rd one in 2-3 weeks of two people from two separate cultures. This Sister went to her brother and said, "I am Muslim and he is Muslim and I have a right to marry him but I don't want to dissapoint the family but if you force me I WILL MARRY HIM"


Therefore, I am Sorry and I don't see your point.

Ehmmm was the family (mehrem) present when you performed the Nikah & seemed they to be happy? Be honest...

I'm not saying you can't get married but you will lose your family in the process. Is it worth? Open for debate...

[isogeople]

Sis no matter where you live in the world Your roots & cultural values always shape your character and attitude towards societal expectations. As I said earlier as well, irrespective of whether or not you are open minded towards marrying other races, your family will always be the biggest burden on your marriage.

Sometimes with marriage it works like this - the more you chase it the more it runs from you. The day you say forget this and you are content in the condition you are in, suddenly prince charming will knock at your door.

[Drugmachine]

Ehmmm was the family (mehrem) present when you performed the Nikah & seemed they to be happy? Be honest...

I'm not saying you can't get married but you will lose your family in the process. Is it worth? Open for debate...

These are four separate issues here.

1. Issue 1: Is this an issue in the Muslim Ummah? Yes
2. Issue 2: Does "Islam" give Muslimah a right to marry a Muslim of her choice? Yes
3. Issue 3: Is this the Muslimah doing anything Islamically or ethically wrong by choosing a Muslim of her choice, outside of her culture? No
4. Issue 4: Should we side with and agree with the family when they are clearly in the wrong? No

At one hand you say that you cannot get married on the other hand you deprive yourself of potential Muslims who will be willing to support you and look after you. Wheres the logic in that?

My experience of last 2 days alone (let alone 15+ years) disagree with your pessimism. Yes this is an issue and yes families create issues but SO WHAT? Are you honestly telling me that a Muslimah should back down from marrying a good Muslim simply because she fears that her family and community will give her a hard time?

My Sister in Islam, its hard I know but Allah (SWT)'s helps those who want to follow the Sunnah of Nikah.

P.S: Plenty of women I know are married outside of their culture and some their families have welcomed back and some havn't. So what?

[dyestymum]

Obviously Sis... Everyone wants to get married to his own kind. Interracial or cultural marriages never work! I would never consider a man who is not from my country & tribe.

This is not true at all.
Myself and my wife are of a different ethnicity and race. I am asian (Indian) and she is english.
I suppose it did help with myself being a revert and my wife's parents both being reverts.

However, I know of countless brothers who have not married into their tribe but are very happy .
There are many asian and revert brothers who are married to Somali sisters in Birmingham.

[Drugmachine]

This is not true at all.
Myself and my wife are of a different ethnicity and race. I am asian (Indian) and she is english.
I suppose it did help with myself being a revert and my wife's parents both being reverts.

However, I know of countless brothers who have not married into their tribe but are very happy .
There are many asian and revert brothers who are married to Somali sisters in Birmingham.

There is a big difference between my Aqeedah/Fiqh/Manhaj/Ethnicity/Culture/Heritage/Language and that of my wife.

No problems, Alhumdolillah. Yes my mother was very apprehensive but she really appreciates her & her family after 11+ years of dealing with them.

And you are right tons of Somali Sisters in Birmingham married to Muslims who are not Somalees.

[23tommy]

Sometimes with marriage it works like this - the more you chase it the more it runs from you. The day you say forget this and you are content in the condition you are in, suddenly prince charming will knock at your door.

Yh maybe you're right

[mxzjxluwst]

Some things are not worth trying. Cultural values & beliefs are rock solid no way to overcome that. You and I both know that this is next to never - as a matter of fact impossible.

Wasnt the culture at the time of the Prophet SAW to bury their daughters alive? And for women to walk around with ankle bracelets with no shame? To cheat, make money off religion, to worship idols, to be superstitious etc etc.

It's much much harder to convince someone that the idols they have devoted their entire lives to is false and has never helped them once, nor ever will, in fact worshipping it will send him to hell instead, than to convince someone that marrying outside your race isn't bad. Matters of religion is always more tough to convince people since they dont like to admit they've spent decades worshipping stone, or nothing.

If Islam could convince the Jaahil that his religion and culture is wrong, and turn him into a Sahaabi, why can't we change our culture?

[rootoronpunty]

I'm not saying you can't get married but you will lose your family in the process. Is it worth? Open for debate...

I agree with you there sister.

Basically A Muslim man from ANY cultural background can marry a Muslim woman from ANY cultural background.
BUT
In most of the muslim societies the marriage is not between only two persons rather its between two families. (not all but)'Most' of the parents DO NOT agree with their daughter or son to marry a person of a different culture.
AND
If the marriage causes to break ties with your family. I 'personally' think ITS JUST NOT WORTH IT.