[Nypbscao]

i have to agree with colonal. This obsesssion with white ladies has dragged many people into jahanum. Before sunnistudent786 jumps on me for arab bashing again let me state that you wont find other races jumping to marry white kuffar ladies (do you see it on the same scale in the afghan community? I doubt it). I know many people whose father is Muslim and mother is a christian. 1 guy told me his father munches halal meat on 1 side of the table whilst his kids and wife munch away on pork etc. The brother in question was half algerian. I would never recommend it but I understand al-faruqi's viewpoint as people are making riduclous demands these days. Actually al-faruqi UK aint that bad you should see some of the arab countries. The youth have no chance of marriage. Maybe someone could get married to a christian girl and make sure she does not get pregnant unless one converts her??? Is it allowed?

[Squeernemergo]

Assalamu alaikum,

Actually it is quite bad in teh Arab countries as well. One Yemeni brother told me that many women are going to the qadis and complaining that their fathers are not getting them married and they are getting old. At first I thought I misunderstood and I thought he meant the women were being forced to marry who they did not like. Then the brother explained to me that since the fathers of the girls were demanding huge mahrs (which the guys were not able to provide) the girls remained unmarried.

[orgagsUpsepsy]

So sad.. The Ta'assub here!!! Someone mentions Arabs, the other then has to pull Pakistanis in, then it goes back to arabs. What a mess!

Al-Faruqi: Try to find a poor alimah girl

[Nypbscao]

In the arab world bad is an understatement. When I was in Syria I used to see mostly like 40-50 year old men with youngish 20 year old girls. This was not an odd thing but a common sight. Whenever I travel in some parts of the arab world (not the khaleej) they are shocked that at such a young age I am married and have kids. Many of them can just dream of such a thing. They have to get a degree, do military service and then get a job and start saving up for mehr and a house which takes years. So then the guy easily reaches his mid to late 30s unless he is rich or goes abroad to work. The arab world is in a real mess because of this. The exception to this rule is the Gulf where the men get married at an earlish age because they can afford the mehr but even that is changing. Then you have massive social problems as a result of such stupidness. I would say it is a lot easier getting married in the West than in arab countries. The ulema need to speak on the mimbar regarding this. The end result of this madness is just zina, single women, pornography etc. I am very very surprised when I meet a man and he is in his 30s and still not married. I mean it is just not normal to be single at that age unless one is commiting haraam or has very very less sexual desires but sadly in most cases it is the former.

[orgagsUpsepsy]

In the arab world bad is an understatement. When I was in Syria I used to see mostly like 40-50 year old men with youngish 20 year old girls.

1) Why do you look at 20 year old GIRLS? It's HARAM!

2) This thread is not about Arabs or Pakistanis or Mallus or Gujratis!

[InsManKV]

The idea here is NOT about marrying a Christian woman in order to found a family and have children, because we --- i.e. the Muslims in daar al-kufr --- all know that in most if not all marriages with a Christian woman the resulting offspring is seriously messed up in their understanding of Islaam or even murtadd. Instead, the idea here is merely about marrying a Christian woman in order to have a halaal outlet for the sexual needs. In other words, a 'halaal girlfriend'.

Under normal circumstances (i.e. in daar al-Islaam) a husband needs the permission of his wife if he wants to use contraception. The reason for this is because it is the wife's right to get impregnated and have children from her husband. However, if the husband is in daar al-kufr or intends to divorce his wife in the future then in that situation he will NOT need the wife's permission for contraception. (This can be read in Islamic Guide to Sexual Relations by Muftee Muhammad Ibn Adam al-Kawthari)

Thus in the above-mentioned 'halaal girlfriend' scenario, the husband would of course use contraception by default without even asking his wife, since he is living in daar al-kufr.

Last but not least we can here again see the huge importance of Khilaafah, since under the Islamic state a man would have the possibility to simply go to the local slave market and buy a cheap slave-girl, from whom the man could then derive halaal pleasure OR set her free and marry her. Thus there would be no need for the whole 'halaal girlfriend' scenario.

Wallaahu a'lam.

[Sapremolz]

This is why we need a 100% halal, 100% modest, 100% respectable matrimonial service. I know sisters who are in the same scenario as mentioned above, divorcee sisters with children looking for a respectable 'part time' pious husband, divorcees looking for someone to share their future with. All have a few traits that will need to be ignored; all considered to be 'tarnished' by our perfect-spouse seeking society and all of whom are too modest to go and advertise themselves through the limited other avenues available.

[Pelefaifs]

I was wondering when someone was going to bring up the idea of divorcees remarrying because that would solve a big side of the problem. But most don't want to give it a try.

[L0KoxewQ]

i have to agree with colonal. This obsesssion with white ladies has dragged many people into jahanum. Before sunnistudent786 jumps on me for arab bashing again let me state that you wont find other races jumping to marry white kuffar ladies (do you see it on the same scale in the afghan community? I doubt it). ....

In NORTH AMERICA which is where I live and where I can speak for, yes, indeed, among the Afghans, Pakistanis, Indians, Iranians, and Turks, then yes, it is just as common. Less common among Bengalis, (black) Africans, Sudanese Arabs, and Somalis.

Furthermore, irrespective of what frequency with which a particular group commits some misdeed, what makes something "bashing" (or any group) two things:

1) highlighting, identifying, or, de facto, restricting your discussion to a particular group when doing so does little to bring additional clarity or insight to the answer to the topic of the thread, in this case, what was gained by highlighting, correctly or not, that Arabs have married a great deal of white women and that their generations have suffered as a result, why not simply say "a great deal of Muslims have....?"

2)I if its part of a consistent pattern of conduct a poster consistently highlighting the negative traits of a particular group or highlighting their ethnicity when the possession of those negative traits or shortcomings are things on which that particular group does not have a monopoly or near(monopoly) and

3) Consistently making an inordinate number of threads and posts devoted specifically to the shortcomings, errors, etc. of a particular group while ignoring others.

I've said it many times before that dislike of the Arab is "ok" on the forum and Indo-Pak circles in general and I'm baffled by this phenomenon.

[kanchouska]

Of course Colonel, the Arabs.

No need to mention the Indians and Pakistanis who have gone the same way.

* Arab bashing *

Brother,

Do you EVER stop and think that perhaps you have a MASSIVE misunderstanding and which you can't let go?

My dear and respected Brother in Islam, I am discussing demographics which apply to Arabs in this case.

This is just the Americas but we can go down the order and actually pin point country by country and continent by continent if it would make you come around and adopt a more balanced way of thinking? I know about these lands very well but not sure what your personal experience is?

There are hunderds of thousands of Murtads and many are down to marrying women of Ahlul-Kitaab

1. Brazil: 10 millions people of Arab Ancestry
2. Mexico: 400,000 people of Arab Ancestry
3. Argentina,
4. Chile,
5. Colombia,
6. Jamaica,
7. the Dominican Republic,
8. Haiti,
9. Trinidad & Tobago,
10. Ecuador,
11. and Venezuela

That’s the pertinence of my post and mentioning of demographics!

[kanchouska]

This I why we need a 100% halal, 100% modest, 100% respectable matrimonial service. I know sisters who are in the same scenario as mentioned above, divorcee sisters with children looking for a respectable 'part time' pious husband, divorcees looking for someone to share their future with. All have a few traits that will need to be ignored; all considered to be 'tarnished' by our perfect-spouse seeking society and all of whom are too modest to go and advertise themselves through the limited other avenues available.

We started this 10 years on central-mosque but shut it down. Detailed proposals were sent to askimam and other Ulama to approve process (on how to conduct this) there may even be a post on SF, to this day no response received.

Personally Maulana Taliban and others should spend their time finding practical solutions and address this matter rather then "the other issue"

[L0KoxewQ]

Brother,

Do you EVER stop and think that perhaps you have a MASSIVE misunderstanding and which you can't let go?

Which is what?

My dear and respected Brother in Islam, I am discussing demographics which apply to Arabs in this case.

This is just the Americas but we can go down the order and actually pin point country by country and continent by continent if it would make you come around and adopt a more balanced way of thinking? I know about these lands very well but not sure what your personal experience is?

There are hunderds of thousands of Murtads and many are down to marrying women of Ahlul-Kitaab

1. Brazil: 10 millions people of Arab Ancestry
2. Mexico: 400,000 people of Arab Ancestry
3. Argentina,
4. Chile,
5. Colombia,
6. Jamaica,
7. the Dominican Republic,
8. Haiti,
9. Trinidad & Tobago,
10. Ecuador,
11. and Venezuela

That’s the pertinence of my post and mentioning of demographics!

Two points:

1) Yes there are people of Arab ancestry in those lands. Did you also know that the vast majority are Levantine, CHRISTIAN Arabs? Regarding those who are Muslim (who are typically later transplants who migrated there since the 70's and beyond), can you point to statistics about how many have become Murtadds and how many of have married non-Muslims?

2) Even if the numbers were astonishingly high, what salience does it have to the topic of the thread to highlight their "Arabness?" If you point is that there is a disturbingly strong correlation between marrying a non-Muslim and having your children end up becoming Kafir, how would your point be made any less strongly by saying "Generations of Muslims have been lost beacuse of Marriage to Kufaar?" Furthermore, your point could have been made even more strongly had you highlighted the fact that this loss of Muslim due to marriage with non-Muslims is not restricted to a single ethnic group or country but that it affects any and all who dare to enter into this kind of arrangement.

Look through your own posts on this forum over the past 3-4 years and see if you dont' observe a disturbing trend when it comes to Arabs and you.

[kanchouska]

Which is what?



Two points:

1) Yes there are people of Arab ancestry in those lands. Did you also know that the vast majority are Levantine, CHRISTIAN Arabs? Regarding those who are Muslim (who are typically later transplants who migrated there since the 70's and beyond), can you point to statistics about how many have become Murtadds and how many of have married non-Muslims?

2) Even if the numbers were astonishingly high, what salience does it have to the topic of the thread to highlight their "Arabness?" If you point is that there is a disturbingly strong correlation between marrying a non-Muslim and having your children end up becoming Kafir, how would your point be made any less strongly by saying "Generations of Muslims have been lost beacuse of Marriage to Kufaar?" Furthermore, your point could have been made even more strongly had you highlighted the fact that this loss of Muslim due to marriage with non-Muslims is not restricted to a single ethnic group or country but that it affects any and all who dare to enter into this kind of arrangement.

Look through your own posts on this forum over the past 3-4 years and see if you dont' observe a disturbing trend when it comes to Arabs and you.

I haven’t been here 3-4 years but Ramadhan is approaching so it makes you feel better about yourself, “I am racist!”

[rNr5Di3S]

I think you all are focusing on the wrong side here.

This phenomenon of Marrying the women of Ahle Kitab is present among people of different races. Naturally some people of a particular race will have more numbers.

But should we blame those people alone and work for a solution in that race alone? NO.

It doesn't matter if this is more among Arabs or indo-pak or any other race. We should work on the solutions to stop this. The solutions might vary among different people, but the message we need to convey is the same.

Why all this argument? Its seriously silly guys. : /

[kanchouska]

Why all this argument? Its seriously silly guys. : /

Because generations of Arabs have become Murtad due to this matter. You can use kids with names like “Aisha, Adil” and Catholic (with a cross in their necks) and you can see this matter OVER & OVER in Brazil, Venezuela, Chilli etc.

[rNr5Di3S]

Because generations of Arabs have become Murtad due to this matter. You can use kids with names like “Aisha, Adil” and Catholic (with a cross in their necks) and you can see this matter OVER & OVER in Brazil, Venezuela, Chilli etc.

This is no laughing matter, I can understand. But we can easily try to discuss without spiraling every discussion into an argument. . I can understand your concern, especially since you have first hand experience. Its really sad.

[attishina]

2) Even if the numbers were astonishingly high, what salience does it have to the topic of the thread to highlight their "Arabness?"

Good point.Jazaks.

[orgagsUpsepsy]

Personally Maulana Taliban and others should spend their time finding practical solutions and address this matter rather then "the other issue"

Hazrat (DB)

Every person can do what is in his reach or what he is capable of doing. I can present myself as the practical solution but I can't do anything more than encourage others and that is what I have been doing.

May Allah just accept the efforts and save me from Hellfire. That's what I just want. Nothing else!

[orgagsUpsepsy]

Why is every thread turned into a stupid argument!!

This is really getting on my nerves now.

You start a decent thread on Islah of Women and it turns into Madressah bashing thread.

You start a thread on marrying ahl e kitab and it turns into a Arab vs Pakistanis Match...

What is the problem with people?

[formobilagsw]

Why is every thread turned into a stupid argument!!

This is really getting on my nerves now.

You start a decent thread on Islah of Women and it turns into Madressah bashing thread.

You start a thread on marrying ahl e kitab and it turns into a Arab vs Pakistanis Match...

What is the problem with people?

Bismillah
Mostly it comes down to people lacking adhab of speech or discussion. People seem to love to write for the sake of it without thinking every word we write is a deed and has a weight and the angels are recording it.