[mikefertynnz]

A Scotsman had been stranded on a deserted island for over ten years!! Once day, he is amazed when a speck he sees in the distance gets closer and closer and then, suddenly, out of the surf, comes a drop dead gorgeous blonde wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.


She approaches the stunned man and says to him, "Tell me, how long has it been since you've had a good smoke?" "Ten years," replies the Scotsman.


With that, she reaches over, unzips a waterproof pocket on her left sleeve and pulls out a pipe, tobacco and a match. He lights it, takes a long draw and says, "Ah, sweet bliss!"

"And how long has it been since you've had a sip of Scotch whisky?" she asks him. Trembling, the castaway replies, "Ten years."


She reaches over, unzips her right sleeve and pulls out a bottle of 25 year-old Single Malt. He opens the flask, takes a thoughtful swig and says, "Fantastic!"


Now she slowly starts opening the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit, looks at the man and, with a glint in her eye, asks him…


"And how long has it been since you've "played around?""


With tears in his eyes, the Scotsman falls to his knees and sobs…

"Sweet mother of God! Don't tell me you've got golf clubs in there, too?"