[Vomazoono]

Here we go. I will split up up into different sections.

Hope you enjoy.

[Vomazoono]

The key to happiness
"Connect - Psychic Medium"

Background

This E-Book is about the life of "Connect - Psychic Medium" during his late teens, early adulthood. At the age of 19, Connect, started doing readings for friends and others who were interested. At that point he knew he had the gift but the mediumship was something done on the side. He knew that to be a good medium he had to be 100% in to it. It would be only a few years after this personal struggle was over that he became a full time psychic medium. "The reaction and feedback was so positive that it was the only decision to make." Connect


Introduction

We all want to be happy but so few of us understand the qualities we need to attain that goal. Life can be difficult a lot of the time, and when it is, history tells us its always for the same reason. But remember, we weren't born unhappy. If you are unhappy, there is always a trigger. I'll talk about my trigger, my struggles, and how I found out the key to being happy once again.

[Vomazoono]

"Insecurity"

Many of us live in fear. We are afraid of the unknown. We all have our insecurities. Some question specific physical features in themselves. Some individuals question their intelligence. Some question their weight. Some question their personality. Some question their social behaviour. Some question their gender. Each person in the world has something they question. Each person has a weakness.

The reason many of us live in fear is because we refuse to get into situations that will confirm our fears and negative attitudes about ourself. For example, if you are overweight, you fear that at some event, that will come into play, and someone will confirm what you might be denying. If you stay at home, if you aren't social, you are safe.

The biggest misunderstanding though is that people think everyone is insecure about the same topics. That is totally false. Not everyone cares about being overweight. Think about this, people take pills to improve their sex life, pills to stop depression, with all kinds of bad side-effects (many guranteed to occur) I remember taking a pill for a very short time that had a chance of making me lose some hair. For me, that was huge. My hair is really important to me. All my life I have had positive comments about my hair. When I go to get a hair-cut the barbers always say what great hair I have and how thick it is. It really does make you feel good. But then you have people who purposley shave their head because they prefer that look. They find it a nuisance and maybe they just look better that way. So all this reminded me of a comment a friend made to me. I was talking about having to take the pill and my worry about the hairloss and he said "Well, you know loads of people take them because they would rather be bald than not be able to get sleep". He was absolutley right.

But that comment has some real power behind it. In today's society, we see an overweight person, and as a society, we assume that they look sad because of their weight. We jump to conclusions because we are programmed to believe that every persons sadness is do to some societal norm not being meant. But that isn't true. As a society we discuss diversity a lot because we do truly believe in it. We truly do like to see differences, afterall, variety is what makes the world exciting. But more to the point, our happiness is not dependent on other peoples thoughts, but only ours. If it bothers us, we are not happy. And even more to the point, we are all born happy, hopeful, non-judgemental about ourself and others, and it is when we decide not to control things that we can, that we get down on ourself. People use things that they can't control as the reason for their sadness, but that is never really the reason. True sadness comes from a lack of hope that was derived from years of non-action.

[Vomazoono]

"My Trigger"

I just moved out of my parents house and was beginning a new life. I have to tell you I was excited. I totally didn't see what was coming. I think parents warn their kids about stuff because they have experienced a lot, but until you experience something personally, you just don't believe it.

But that isn't strange, that is like a lot of things in life. I remember when I was in my late teens and dad wanted my brother and I to consider finding jobs. I was quiet scared. I was not social and a huge part had to do with how my brother and I were brought up. Both my brother and I were fearful, shy, kids, who didn't have the most self-esteem. But soon enough I got the guts to go downtown, sit down for an interview, and sure enough was hired by a coffee place. Sure I was a bit nervous early on, but very quickly I got accustomed to the job, the people, the customers, and my fear was gone. The fears that you have when you lack experience are extreme. People can tell you a million times that something is not a big deal, but until you experience it, words mean nothing. Fear has that power, and experience is the only thing that can rectify it. Before that experience, it may sound funny, but I seriously thought there was a chance I could die if I got a job. Not only did i live, but I received positive feedback, met wonderful co-workers, made friends, and had a very positive experience overall.

There is that old saying, at least from my neck of the woods, about listening to mom and dad. Generally, that is a good thing to follow, but remember that some parents are naturally over-protective. And remember, the world changes, people live different lives, so you are bound to experience things they didn't have to experience. A good parent prepares their children to face any battle but you can never fully know exactly what your children will face. Considering where I am today, I think mine did a great job.

So to continue the story...I was finally settled in my new place. I had quit my coffee job not long before because I thought I was ready to move on to something better. I had worked there for two years. I had a bit of money saved up so I was ok for a little while without work. But one of the first surprises I got living on my own was bills that I wasn't expecting (due to cancelling services, unexpected moving charges, etc etc) to the point that I needed a job badly. So in that panic, I looked for any type of job I could find. I ended up at a food retail store. I ended up being so desperate that I said I was willing to work over-night in the warehouse. That decision would negativley impact my life for awhile.

At that point in time I never knew how badly it would impact me. I thought about it quiet logically I thought. I would sleep during the day, work during the night, what can be so confusing?

But working at the job for awhile got me really frustrated. My life was so different. No it wasn't just because I was living on my own, or because I was doing a fairly tough job, but my day-to-day life was much different. I worked during the night, when most people sleeped, and I came home to sleep, when most people worked. The fact of the matter was that my friends had the normal schedules and most of the time I felt I couldn't go out with them. It just seemed to me, fairly early on, that my social life was gone with this job.

I was always a really responsible person. I knew that for my employer, but for myself too, I had to be ready each night to do my job. But one day I just decided to forget my usual routine. I didn't sleep before work that night and instead I went out. The worst decision I ever made.

That decision was a defining moment. But being annoyed for quiet awhile with the job, because of the lack of balance it created in my life, made me make a bad decision. I will always remember how tired I was that night. I remember how different I felt. I couldn't wait for the shift to be over. It seemed to drag on forever. I felt tired, I looked tired, and my experience on the job felt like no time before. I couldn't concentrate. It was almost as if I was drunk and high at the same time. Imagine feeling all that and then having to do that heavy labour job for a good nine hours.

The lack of responsibility on my part led to a fear. The fear for me began to be "what if I don't sleep again and have to come in feeling like that again". Now, don't get me wrong, I have stayed up many times, late late into the night with friends , and had work fairly early in the morning, but I that was different. I was never annoyed with my previous job as I was now, and I had never stayed up purposley or even considered how would it be if I never got any sleep. The consideration never came to mind because my job was just fine, and night just seemed like the logical time to sleep. Why wouldn't I sleep during the night?

But the fear was real. The next night I could not sleep because I was too worried about having that feeling again. I called in sick because I didn't sleep. Soon it would become a regular thing. I just couldn't sleep anymore. So for me, I didn't see another option, I had to quit the job.

[Vomazoono]

"The Depressing Year"

For about a year I was unemployed, living with my brorther, in a state of depression. It is great to have family around, because in time of need, you really see what family means.

This was probably the toughest year of my life. The issue that was created from that job experience was a big one. I continued having issues sleeping. I felt like not doing anything. I couldn't understand how I couldn't sleep anymore. I felt very down all the time. I was not hanging out with friends and I didn't want to hang out with friends. When I didn't get sleep, I didn't have any of that great confidence I usually have. I felt disoriented, lost, I lacked confidence. It was a long year of not doing anything.

Then throughout that year there were attempts at jobs but I couldn't hold any of those jobs anymore. I was just too tired. I would even sleep some nights, but the stress, my state of depression, totally drained me out. Basically I had just started to feel as though nobody could rely on me. I was depressed and with every new employer I felt as though they were counting on me and I couldn't be reliable (like I always had been in the past) In the interviews I knew I would be lying about being reliable because the last year or so I was anything but. I relied on my brother to get me through that time.

I just remember feeling as though there was nothing that can happen to change all that was happening.

[Vomazoono]

"My Parents"

During the depressing time, I really didn't see an out. I thought I would never be able to sleep properly again. I thought I would have to rely on my brother forever. I thought that I would get worse and become a person I was not proud of.

One of the things that helped me get over it was remembering how hard my parents worked their whole life. I watched them go to work tired many days. There were even times that my dad would cry, because of the difficulty of his job, and how many hours he had to put in each week. Sometimes, even the boss was a real pain, but he had to put up with it, there was just no other option when you have a wife and two kids to feed.

But sometimes you don't realize what an asset your parents are. They are not just there to take care of you, to love you unconditionally, they are your look into the future. There is that famous saying about not forgetting history because its bound to repeat itself. I find that to be one of the most profound sayings in our history. You were composed from fifty-percent of your dad's genes and fifty-percent of mom's. As much as you may hate it, you are a breed of both of them.

Most of us love to state that we hope to never be like our dad or mom, but that would be considering things the negative way. The fact that our parents have made it, the fact that they have gone through life with a certain amount of strength, shows us that we can too.

But a lot of the time we don't understand the importance of family. Think about those that don't know who their family is. Now knowing who your family is isn't just about not having unconditional love, it's about not knowing who you are. If we know our parents weaknesses, we have a chance to change those things for the future. If one of your parents had cancer, chances are much much greater you will too. That is the number one risk. (the relation) If your a male, and your dad lost his hair, then you will probably too. But the knowing gives you a chance to do things decades ahead to potentially change that.

[Vomazoono]

"The Key"

There is no doubt that a huge part of me getting better was the realization that my parents went through many similar things. Today, they still have their tough days, like all people, but they are generally happy, well-adjusted human beings. But ultimatley, the sadness to happiness conversion began when I found "The Key" to happiness.

I think when we are depressed we feel we have to do big things to get better. We feel as though there is just so much to do because there is so much wrong. The key to being happy is quiet a bit simpler however.

The first thing you have to do is realize that turning your sadness to happiness involves changing the things you can change. The second component is a decision you have to make in regards to what you really want to change. What do you care about? Do you care about eating healthy? Do you care about being fit? Do you care about being somewhat social? Is it important to maintain a job? Is spending quality time with kids important? Do you love to cook? Do you want to get wealthy? You want to write down at least five interests you have. The thing is, all the things you write down, you will have to do at least once per week. Then each day you simply start doing those things. Each day you have to do at least one of those things on your list. You can obviously do more. They key however is to do at least one.

The biggest issue with depression and sadness is that we become frozen. We don't want to do anything, nothing is important, and its a circle of nothing-ness. At the end of day we tend to feel the worst because we feel as though we accomplished nothing. That is the biggest issue. That is what allows sadness to go on and not get better. But if you start doing something positive each and every day, something you really do enjoy, the days will slowly seem better. You start feeling as though things were not perfect but it was somewhat of a productive day. A sense of pride starts to kick in. But the key is to keep that going.

I remember in my struggle one of the things on my list was to maintain a job. That was important. You want to be realistic early on because you want to get yourself on a roll. So, early on, my goal was to just work two to three days a week. There were days I was tired, didn't get the most sleep, but I went to work. It was tough, but soon enough, going to work in that state, and being strong, got rid of the paranoia and lack of power I felt in the past.

I had other goals too. I wanted to eat healthy everday. I wanted to start excercising regularly again. I wanted to start cooking more. I wanted to get out more (like I had in the past) So each day became a day for one of those things. On the days that I didn't excercise I tried to eat extra healthy. Then on some days I would workout. On another day I would take time to cook something I enjoyed making. On another day I would have work. On another day I would push myself to go out, some days not even with a friend, but just outside to shop alone or do something. Each day now I felt a sense of accomplishment. I was doing things. My confidence started to increase again. I was happy to be doing things that I enjoyed.

The sleep issues? That was all solved with more confidence. Sleep was not an issue anymore because I was happy doing the things I cared about. I didn't feel my life was a waste anymore because I was doing things I loved.

[Vomazoono]

Conclusion

Simply put, non-action is what makes us sad. Until people understand that point, they will continue to be depressed. We are not sad because of the things we can't change. We live in a world where you can make choices. We can choose our friends, we can choose who we work for, we can even control the smallest details in our life. Individualism is not just a word, diversity is not just a word, they are facts. Everyone is different, everyone looks for different things, and as an individual, you should be busy looking, exploring, as well.

Not doing anything is the worst mistake of all. Our happiness rests on our goals, our interests, being satisfied. It sounds so simple but so many people just don't realize it. I don't know how we ever came to the realization that sitting down and thinking about the past was going to make us happy. Who was the person that figured that sitting down and analyzing for days, weeks and sometimes months on end, about the things we did and why we did them, was going to honestly give us answers. Life doesn't give you answers, it gives you options.

Life's work is in fact weeding through the bad, the non-matching, the unimportant, and finding the good, the matching, and the important.
By doing the things you love, you will be happy enough, confident enough, and aware enough, to take part in the most important part of our existence, and that is the experience of life. Just take it all in. Understand there will be downs, but they will not break your back, they will just be part of the amazing journey.

[Vomazoono]

Hi guys,

Tomorrow I'm going to post my e-book which is titled "The Keys to Happiness". It's totally free and I just wanted to share my personal story of struggle, depression, and how I found the key to being happy.

The E-book is not that long but I'd say its a good read. I have written quiet a few E-books on different topics but this is the first that is of a personal nature.

The e-book is not long. It has a short intro, five headings that contain approx. 3-4 paragraphs each. and a conclusion. But that is how I generally write them. I basically try to condense a whole story, that could potentially be 150pages, into five pages.

This all occured few years ago.

I wrote it all down because I really feel it can help other people. Once I started writing I just felt it all coming together. I look at it as a doc-ument that people can read when they feel down and say to themselves "I can do that too". They can use the text as motivation. I am pretty happy how I brought it together and I think it will make sense to a lot of people.

Look forward to your feedback.