[OccabsLam]

(What I ask you to answer is actually in PART 4 but to get a little grip about everything if you have time please read the entire post)

PART 1: Introduction of what caused PART 2

To go directly to the issue:
I have something in my mind that I've always been wondering about what happened, It now was approx 3 years ago.
When I was 20. I started smoking cannabis when I was 18 and I did that chronicly for 2 years every day, at the last half year I lived in amsterdam and did it each 15 minutes. Then an Insight suddenly struck me, why am I doing this? I have destroyed it? I can no longer absorb anything out from this plant anymore at the moment it only blocks me. I threw away my joint and immeaditly went home to sweden again. I locked myself home, to not go out with friends so much to hold me away from the cannabis, I suceeded and this is what happends half year after beeing 100% clean when I was walking home from the buss.

PART 2: About my stress and EXTREME ANXIOUS

I've always been a philosopher or analyzer and thinker. And suddenly when I was walking. BOOM, something crawled trough my body and totaly twisted my entire focus on the reality and turned it upside down. FEAR TOOK CONTROL OVER MY ENTIRE BEING.I lost the grip totaly and got completely locked inside my brain with looping thoughts of negativity. What is happening am I going insane? and stuff like that. I went home and I remember I asked my mother am I dreaming or is this reality? I was 100% sure of that I had a "pshycosis" I did not really know at the moment what I pshycosis was but in 4 days I was walking around in my home trying to do stuff to lay may thoughts on but it was impossible. The external reality was blocked by me being locked inside my own head of negative thoughts that. I'm wasted for life, I have become insane. This is how I experienced for an example an conversation with my mother "I observed my self (not visually ofcourse like a hallucination) from my self talking to my mother spitting out words that I could not understand and vice verse. I was so totaly blocked by my total chaos inside my own head. I thought for my self ok, will this go on like this in a week I have to commit suicide, this pain is to insane to live trough, there is no meaning. Well to the point now I have to ask you what happend the 4th day. (One thing to keep in mind is that I was TOTALY aware of everything that happened this 4 days of INTENSTE STRESS, ANXIOUSNESS, CHAOS)

PART 3: This is where my mother woke me up on the 4th morning (THIS IS WHAT HAPPENDS JUST BEFORE IT HAPPEND)

I woke up, Fell asleep again into some kind of state between awake and asleep. Semi-lucid or something, I think I was aware of that I was dreaming but I coudln't control it. I see my self sitting in a car going to my grandparents house where I grew up, and I looked at the trees by the roadside they had so wonderful and strange shape and I thought to my self (When I go back here I shall really study the trees and feel joy for there beauty) I's like my life is rewinding backwards or something. Later I see my self when I was 5 years old with my mother in the city and I feel so extreme joy for not beeing distracted and disturbed of the society and the intellect as I am now. And I thought for my self as I was looking around and feeling extreme joy. Wow what the dream (with dream I meant life, but I said dream) was different when one was a child and if I just could keep this feeling back to my adult life everything would be just wonderful. Then here is where the magic HAPPENDS!

PART 4: WHAT HAVE I EXPERIENCED?

BOOOOOOOM! Suddenly I find myself in a space, well my body is atleast gone but my mind is there, everything is a light of the same color, It's radiant. Like a burst of explosion my entire soul fills with some kind of energy/feeling streaming out that I never felt before and I can not describe it with words niether. This feeling is so wonderful so complete, total hapyness, total love i think it is, joy or whatever you should call it, but still so monotome, because it's perfect. This is my only two thought-sentences.
"I wanna stay here for the rest of my entire life."
"No, I wanna stay here for all eternity, just to feel this emotion nothing else".
Immeaditly after these two thoughts I wake up and WOW!

Life has so much potential I think, If one can experience this in life, there is no limit for possibilities what one can do with one's life, this is what saved me and kept me going. I had no answer for what this was, what I just had experienced.
Until I read on Bruce's homepage about astral projection and the description of Buddhic Dimension.
I have no experiences of meditation or astral projection excersises or stuff like that.

I have a hypothesis that all my thoughts of time,death,life,feelings my I don't know the english word, I had put 95% focus on just to think and talk about spiritual stuff the last 2 years. Led me to this burst of total stress I whic resulted in some kind of trigger in my brain or soul or mind our whatever that activated some kind of mechanism that kicked me into the buddhic dimension. Since I didn't travel there with astral projection and had no knowledge of what that is I could not be very perceptive our aware enough to take in the whole experience of being there. But this was an mechanism activated in my brain to save me from going under and take me back to life again and keep on this struggle. This is my only thought on the whole, please guide me!

Kindest regards (and excuse me for my bad writing-techniques).

[OccabsLam]

I have waited patiantly and wonder;

Isnt there anyone who can explain my experience?

OR CAN YOU PLEASE MOVE THIS TO ASK ROBERT SUB-FORUM, moderator?

[Hammaduersnes]

I suggest you shorten it a bit and then repost it in the 'Ask Robert' forum. This post is so very long he might not read it.
ps. Patience, someone may come upon it and have something to say.

[QuidQuoPro]

This sounds like a very cool experience! Something similar happened to me during my meditation. I think what happened was somehow parts of the brain got activated or integrated in some way. I found very interesting explanation and description in Jill Bolte Taylor's interview by Oprah. Many people probably have heard of her. This Harvard brain neuroscientist suffered a stroke where her left brain got damaged and she basically functioned with her right brain, which triggered the most profound experiences that's similar to awakened state. It is a very fascinating account of the whole event that lasted weeks.

Suzanne Segal, ahthor of the book " Collision with the Infinite," one day just out of the blue felt like she turned into this observer of her self from about one step behind herself to watch everything she did. She also had very profound experiences and realizations with the event. But finally she past on from a brain tumor. But her book really is an inspiration to read.

Meditation can trigger this change in our brain as well. A lot of studies have proved the dramatic shift in areas of brains that have to do with learning, positive mood, spacial and temporal awareness,......Perhaps somehow the use of joint trigger the change in your brain.

Anyway, this is one of the best things in life to encounter. I have basically told myself that I have got what I am here to learn/discover this life.

Then it occurred to me that I can do more OBEs to explore this immense universe!!

[beloveds]

The daze you seemed to be in i can only relate to a bad 'negitive energy-over shadowing' something like this daze happened to me and its Horrible. the experience you had after may have been clearing the neg. this may have happend because a higher energy wanted to show you how good life, sometimes its hard to see how good you have it till its gone.

[Cxcvvfbgtr]

When I was smoking pot it led to intense panic attacks, and a general sense of anxiety, which also led me to similar experiences that I did not correlate at the time to drugs, the value I gained was the knowledge that for some people pot causes anxiety attacks, so I quit immediatly. Only then I kept drinking alcohol and smoking cigarettes, as well as drinking caffiene and not sleeping. This also led to panic. So I quit everything except drinking, and only last month actually, this is after drinking for 20 years like a moron, I still had the anxiety, Its lends itself to lucidity, but I couldnt handle stress, just talking to people made me uneasy, crowds, or meetings at work, someone driving behind me not even tailgaitng id get paranoid even though I know its just a regular driver. I couldnt figure it out until it finally dawned on me that the alcohol I thought was calming me was actually destoying my nervous system. I looked it up and sure enough its a big link, panic hangovers. I quit 1 month ago and anxiety is completely gone. So are my lucid dreams and projections. But I think i'll be able to learn the techniques other people use since I remeber what it feels like. But anyway, I have often wondered if I was assisted to a peacefull area by an unseen force to show me what I needed to see and feel to change and get clean. If I was smarter I would have realised this when it happened. W