Wanted to share this... - DiscussWorldIssues - Socio-Economic Religion and Political Uncensored Debate

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 08:49 AM

Found it on a website. Figured a few people on this site might enjoy it.

**jeaccatty** · 10-17-2011, 08:53 AM

I like quite a few of the points it makes I am amused by such lists... I just found this one, while searching for my favourite one...

DOG COMMANDMENTS

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3 I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although they are tasty.

4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.

5. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps.

6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

8. I will not bite the officer' s hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration.

9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".

11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.

12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

13. I will not throw up in the car.

14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when we have company.

16. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

And, finally, My last question . . .

Dear God: Why do humans only have 10 Commandments and dogs have 16?

P.S. When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 08:57 AM

I like the ones with the cats. Especially the "squeaky toy" one. Chevelle plays with our cat, Razmatazz, and he makes horrible noises (even though he comes back for more all the time, stupid cat) and she thinks it's just him having fun and she gets more excited, lol

**jeaccatty** · 10-17-2011, 08:59 AM

In my house, cats ARE legit squeaky toys... sooo, I don't have cats. lol

**Trercakaressy** · 10-17-2011, 09:46 AM

damn you post some weird shit up lol most of the threads posted today was posted by you

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 10:12 AM

Yeah, I wouldn't doubt it. OOPS

**jeaccatty** · 10-17-2011, 10:38 AM

damn you post some weird shit up lol most of the threads posted today was posted by you

At least she contributes... unlike someone ELSE we ALL know

**Trercakaressy** · 10-17-2011, 10:39 AM

At least she contributes... unlike someone ELSE we ALL know

dont make me come over their

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 10:41 AM

Oh lord, serious grammar malfunction. *twitches*

**jeaccatty** · 10-17-2011, 10:50 AM

dont make me come over their

And do what? Get your ass whooped before you even figure out how to undo the chain on the gate? lol

Oh lord, serious grammar malfunction. *twitches*

He hasn't gotten to the grade where they teach that yet.. don't judge the poor boy

**Trercakaressy** · 10-17-2011, 10:54 AM

And do what? Get your ass whooped before you even figure out how to undo the chain on the gate? lol

He hasn't gotten to the grade where they teach that yet.. don't judge the poor boy

chloe come comfort me their being mean to me

**jeaccatty** · 10-17-2011, 10:56 AM

chloe come comfort me their being mean to me

That's right... talk big at first, then go cryin' to your... er, nevermind.

**Trercakaressy** · 10-17-2011, 10:57 AM

your bout to get an ass whoopin

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 10:59 AM

Their**They're**There
Your**You're
Where**Wear**

SHIT DRIVES ME INSANE, MAN.

**jeaccatty** · 10-17-2011, 11:01 AM

Alex... For some strange reason, I highly doubt that lol

Barbara... ME TOO. And when people don't use punctuation. Or that "text shorthand" bullshit... is it REALLY that fucking hard to type "you" instead of "u" or "to" instead of 2?!?!!? ARRGGGH!

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 11:05 AM

yea dood wen ppl tlk like dis it jus makes me wan 2 hurt some 1

**jeaccatty** · 10-17-2011, 11:09 AM

AHHHHHHHHH EVEN THOUGH I KNOW YOU'RE JOKING, IT FRUSTRATES ME SOOO MUCH!!!

lol I can't even do it on purpose like that. I've tried even shortening the names of local towns like people will do in texts... K-Ville, or M-town, ya know... not TOO bad... and I can't even do THAT!

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 11:12 AM

I know what you mean man. You just want to shake them and give them a 4th grade education.

**Trercakaressy** · 10-17-2011, 11:29 AM

do you bitches ever shut the fuck up lol you bitch like your on your period

**Stacypettlerr** · 10-17-2011, 11:31 AM

I think he's doing it on purpose now.

10-17-2011, 08:49 AM	#1
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	Wanted to share this... Found it on a website. Figured a few people on this site might enjoy it. Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
	Quote

10-17-2011, 08:53 AM	#2
jeaccatty Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 587 Senior Member	I like quite a few of the points it makes I am amused by such lists... I just found this one, while searching for my favourite one... DOG COMMANDMENTS 1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up. 2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell. 3 I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although they are tasty. 4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. 5. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps. 6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. 7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator. 8. I will not bite the officer' s hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration. 9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. 10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello". 11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table. 12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after. 13. I will not throw up in the car. 14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt. 15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when we have company. 16. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing. And, finally, My last question . . . Dear God: Why do humans only have 10 Commandments and dogs have 16? P.S. When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back? Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
	Quote

10-17-2011, 08:57 AM	#3
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	I like the ones with the cats. Especially the "squeaky toy" one. Chevelle plays with our cat, Razmatazz, and he makes horrible noises (even though he comes back for more all the time, stupid cat) and she thinks it's just him having fun and she gets more excited, lol Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
	Quote

10-17-2011, 08:59 AM	#4
jeaccatty Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 587 Senior Member	In my house, cats ARE legit squeaky toys... sooo, I don't have cats. lol Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 09:46 AM	#5
Trercakaressy Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 490 Senior Member	damn you post some weird shit up lol most of the threads posted today was posted by you Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 10:12 AM	#6
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	Yeah, I wouldn't doubt it. OOPS Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 10:38 AM	#7
jeaccatty Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 587 Senior Member	damn you post some weird shit up lol most of the threads posted today was posted by you At least she contributes... unlike someone ELSE we ALL know Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 10:39 AM	#8
Trercakaressy Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 490 Senior Member	At least she contributes... unlike someone ELSE we ALL know dont make me come over their Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 10:41 AM	#9
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	Oh lord, serious grammar malfunction. twitches Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 10:50 AM	#10
jeaccatty Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 587 Senior Member	dont make me come over their And do what? Get your ass whooped before you even figure out how to undo the chain on the gate? lol Oh lord, serious grammar malfunction. twitches He hasn't gotten to the grade where they teach that yet.. don't judge the poor boy Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
	Quote

10-17-2011, 10:54 AM	#11
Trercakaressy Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 490 Senior Member	And do what? Get your ass whooped before you even figure out how to undo the chain on the gate? lol He hasn't gotten to the grade where they teach that yet.. don't judge the poor boy chloe come comfort me their being mean to me Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
	Quote

10-17-2011, 10:56 AM	#12
jeaccatty Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 587 Senior Member	chloe come comfort me their being mean to me That's right... talk big at first, then go cryin' to your... er, nevermind. Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
	Quote

10-17-2011, 10:57 AM	#13
Trercakaressy Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 490 Senior Member	your bout to get an ass whoopin Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 10:59 AM	#14
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	TheirThey'reThere YourYou're WhereWear** SHIT DRIVES ME INSANE, MAN. Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 11:01 AM	#15
jeaccatty Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 587 Senior Member	Alex... For some strange reason, I highly doubt that lol Barbara... ME TOO. And when people don't use punctuation. Or that "text shorthand" bullshit... is it REALLY that fucking hard to type "you" instead of "u" or "to" instead of 2?!?!!? ARRGGGH! Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 11:05 AM	#16
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	yea dood wen ppl tlk like dis it jus makes me wan 2 hurt some 1 Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 11:09 AM	#17
jeaccatty Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 587 Senior Member	AHHHHHHHHH EVEN THOUGH I KNOW YOU'RE JOKING, IT FRUSTRATES ME SOOO MUCH!!! lol I can't even do it on purpose like that. I've tried even shortening the names of local towns like people will do in texts... K-Ville, or M-town, ya know... not TOO bad... and I can't even do THAT! Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
	Quote

10-17-2011, 11:12 AM	#18
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	I know what you mean man. You just want to shake them and give them a 4th grade education. Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 11:29 AM	#19
Trercakaressy Join Date Oct 2005 Posts 490 Senior Member	do you bitches ever shut the fuck up lol you bitch like your on your period Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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10-17-2011, 11:31 AM	#20
Stacypettlerr Join Date Nov 2005 Posts 456 Senior Member	I think he's doing it on purpose now. Share Share this post on Digg Del.icio.us Technorati Twitter
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