[gugamotina]

It is really hard not giving into her misery. I know it is BEST to avoid re-enforcing her now but it is hard when I myself am hurting. She is moping around the house crying, smelling his crate, looking out the window, and coming up to me putting her paw on my lap and crying.

I debated letting her in with us when Tonka left us but I couldnt bare seeing her react when I myself was a mess. Does anyone have opinions on how to help her deal? Should I have let her in with us to see him pass? I just don't think she would understand. I also don't want her to start thinking we will get rid of her now. I think I am reading too much into this, it is just not a place I am familiar with. I have always had dogs pass on but never put to sleep at such a young age.

[JonnLeejsp]

I think dogs need some time to mourn and realize that the other one isn't coming back...I say spend a day or so moping with her and cuddling her then start back to "life goes on"

I would say go for a hike with her but seeing as your in Boston I don't know if that is possible

[gambleingsites]

yep, just act as normal as possible under the circumstances...

[lomonel]

i agree with everyone.

poor Irie :'( *sending you, irie and hubby lots of hugs*

[gugamotina]

Yea maybe this weekend we can go on a few hour hike if it isnt snowing- she and Tonka loved hiking.

[gambleingsites]

ok, as much as possible, you need to try and change your train of thought...
it is no longer, she and tonka.... it is no longer you and tonka...
it is now you and her.... what you enjoy doing with her...
she is going to pick up on your emotions, and she will be somewhat depressed, or at least less fullfilled if you are thinking about tonka during the hike....

[JakeBarkings]

Dutch was with us when we put Mo down, he mate of thirteen years... It was on our front porch... she lay with him when he went. They were both old... She got very frantic when he passed on, and when he was carried away. She found where he was buried and just moped around in that area... Within a couple of weeks the pack structure changed and she was back to herself.

I would say no. I had to rehome a dog once, Sparkles buddy, and she mourned for a little while but got over it.

I kept them busy... Dutch especially loved her boy. She spent 90% of her time with him, when he got older she took care of him, kept his eyes and ears clean... Let him win any games they played. She could cry her heart out if he left the yard. But she moved on quickly enough.





---------- Post added at 11:31 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:30 AM ----------

Try to act normal. Hard as it is...

[gugamotina]

ok, as much as possible, you need to try and change your train of thought...
it is no longer, she and tonka.... it is no longer you and tonka...
it is now you and her.... what you enjoy doing with her...
she is going to pick up on your emotions, and she will be somewhat depressed, or at least less fullfilled if you are thinking about tonka during the hike....

Yea I clearly am having a hard time doing this though. I value very few things/people he was one of them. I need to work on getting over it as well.

[heinz_1966]

It's only been a day - ease up on yourself!! Mourn. Let Irie mourn. It isn't easy but you will be okay and move on and so will Irie.

It was a year and a month ago that my dog died, and I was devastated for the first few days. Me and the cat were both just miserable (stupid cat even mourned for the dog). The first week I had a hard time coming home from work cause my dog wasn't there. The second week, I thought how horrible it was to come home from work and not have a dog. The third week I started working on a plan for a new dog cause coming home to the cat was not nearly as much fun as coming home to a dog.

I am so sorry you and Irie have to go through this. BUT I see a brighter side to all of this and that is that you are a wonderful person who is willing to foster and help out so many "good" dogs. You will be up and at it with a new foster in no time and probably end up adopting another dog in the near future. I give you a month or less and you will be posting pictures of your next foster or rescue.

And Irie will be fine too. Remember, she just lost your other foster also so she's had a lot of changes in a short time frame. Just give her a chance to adjust and yourself as well.

[Blelidupgerie]

I don't think in this instance that there would be anything wrong in acknowledging her sadness and confusion and letting her understand that YOU know and are sad as well....her confusion and sadness are therefore verified...

Carla

[DP5Ups8o]

Maybe start doing a new activity with her that she never did before. Maybe you could start walking in a new area thats just you and hers. Maybe just doing something new so the both of you are preoccupied with the new sights and sounds would be good therapy for the both of you. Just my opinion and I could be wrong

[Deseassaugs]

She will be OK with time just like you will be just do the things with her that you have always done .

[AriaDesser]

obed gave you great advice about the hiking...
try to do things that will occupie your mind as well, so she won't pick up on your emotions

[chzvacmyye]

I just read your post about putting Tonka to sleep and just wanted to say that you are really strong for being able to make such a difficult and heart breaking decision. I can imagine that watching Irie try to deal is making it even more difficult. You made a really tough choice but it was absolutely for the best. I wish you and Irie the best in coping with his loss and hope that you keep in mind that you did the right thing. I am so sorry for your loss