[SHpuntik]

Howdy all

As a newbie to the site, I've created this survey in order to get to know the tennis likes and dislikes of the other TATers. I like to know ahead of time who I will delight and who I will offend when I write scathing commentary about people's favorite players.

Please fill in the blanks with the appropriate ATP or WTA tour player in the statements below.

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about _____________.

_____________ has the best forehand in the biz.

____________'s backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

____________ sure has a wicked serve.

I model my own tennis game after ______________.

______________ is the best player to never win a Slam--YET.

My favorite obscure player is _____________.

DISLIKES

If you're talking smack about ______________, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

_____________ is the whiniest player on either tour.

_____________ has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching ________________ play.

_____________'s pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

___________________ bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be _______________, _________________, and ________________.

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw _______________ naked.

I would consider going gay/straight for ________________.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting crunk with tennis players, my posse would consist of ________________, _________________, and ______________.

______________ would make the best conversationalist.

________________ is the player most like to end up in prison, while ________________ may one day end up in an insane asylum.

[zooworms]

freakin' awesome, JT. I need a little while to complete this...but I'm looking forward to posting my answers, and reading everyone elses.

[SHpuntik]

freakin' awesome, JT. I need a little while to complete this...but I'm looking forward to posting my answers, and reading everyone elses.

Sweet. Eventually, I'll tally up all the replies, and give some percentages.

[Elelaytet]

freakin' awesome, JT. I need a little while to complete this...but I'm looking forward to posting my answers, and reading everyone elses.

yup, I love it.


but i have to think about some. Moose can guess the only answer I'm certain about

[BaselBimbooooo]

Fabulous. This will take awhile.

[fuesquemill]

I've been meaning to say how much I love your avatar (and the fact that we have more West Coasters on TAT.

What fun! Whilst the rest of them painstakingly pour over their responses, I'm going with the first thing that pops into my head. You know ... with all the forethought that Ginepri will someday put into his proposal, when it inevitably happens at a Gas 'n Sip in Georgia.

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about Mary Pierce.

Roger Federer has the best forehand in the biz.

Justine Henin's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

Andy Roddick sure has a wicked serve.

I model my own tennis game after Andre Agassi.

Nadia Petrova is the best player to never win a Slam--YET.


My favorite obscure player is Olivier Patience (don't think Clement is obscure enough for this one).

DISLIKES

If you're talking smack about Sharapova, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Serena Williams is the whiniest player on either tour.
mmmm8's answer is better and more specific.

Ivo Karlovic has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching Tommy Robredo play.

Daniela Hantuchova's pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

Arantxa Sanchez-Vicario bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Mikhail Youzhny, Arnaud Clement, and Andy Roddick. And the following night it would be Richard Gasqet, Robbie Ginepri (because he'd lose quickly), Dmitry Tursunov, Filippo Volandri, Olivier Rochus, and Rainer Schuettler. And then Alexander Waske and Michael Russell. And then ...
I REALLY like poker(s)

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw Pete Sampras naked.

I would consider going straight for Ana Ivanovic.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting drunk with tennis players, my posse would consist of Amelie Mauresmo (who'd have the best wine), Jelena Jankovic (who already tells it like it is ... I can't IMAGINE what she'd let slip if tipsy), and Novak Djokovic (who just looks like a hell of a good time).
(hope I didn't completely misunderstand this one by fixing what I thought was a typo--if so, it just exposes what an utter WASP I am).

Jelena Jankovic would make the best conversationalist.

Nicolas Kiefer is the player most like to end up in prison, while Patty Schnyder may one day end up in an insane asylum.

S

[JakeBarkings]

Scotty- Love it. I have to work on mine now.

[SHpuntik]

Hilarious, Scotty, especially the Aranxta one...

Crunk IS a real word, but the meaning is roughly the same.

Still working on mine...

[zooworms]

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about KIM CLIJSTERS.

RAFA (on clay) SERENA (on any other surface) has the best forehand in the biz.

JUSTINE HENIN'S backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

FELICIANO LOPEZ sure has a wicked serve.

I model my own tennis game after the Spanish chase down everything players.

DAVID NALBANDIAN is the best player to never win a Slam--YET.

My favorite obscure player is JANKO TIPSAREVIC.

DISLIKES

I've you're talking smack about MARIA SHARAPOVA, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

JENNIFER CAPRIATI is the whiniest player on either tour.

IVO KARLOVIC has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching NICOLE VAIDISOVA play.

MARY PIERCE'S pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting. (sorry, Scotty!)

DANIELA HANTUCHOVA bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be ROBBY GINEPRI, XAVIER MALISSE, and JANKO TIPSAREVIC.

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw CONCHITA MARTINEZ naked.

I would consider going gay/straight for THE YOUNGER VERSION OF EMMANUELLE (MANU) GAGLIARDI.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting crunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of SERENA WILLIAMS, NOVAK DJOKOVIC, and FRANCESCA SCHIAVONE.

TATIANA GOLOVIN would make the best conversationalist.

SESIL KARANTANCHEVA is the player most like to end up in prison, while MARAT SAFIN may one day end up in an insane asylum.

[JakeBarkings]

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about Raja, Rafa Kimmie.

RAJA has the best forehand in the biz.

Mauresmo's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

Roddick/ Serena sure has a wicked serve. (when it’s working)

I model my own tennis game after Mauresmo.

Nalbandian is the best player to never win a Slam--YET.

My favorite obscure player is Anna Smashnova and Ollie Rochus.

DISLIKES

I've you're talking smack about Kiefer and Haas, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Serena W. and Nicholas Kiefer are the whiniest player on either tour.

Dr. Ivo has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching Robredo and half the WTA play.

Rafa’s and Mary Pierce's pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

Tommy Haas bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Marat Safin, James Blake, and half of the Spainish Davis Cup team, especially Feliciano Lopez and Carlos Moya

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw Davydenko naked.

I would consider going gay for no one.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting crunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of Marat Safin, Amelie Mauresmo, Serena Williams and Jelena Jankovic. (Capriati maybe added since she’s a party girl-LOL)

Jelena Jankovic would make the best conversationalist.

N. Keifer is the player most like to end up in prison, while Davydenko may one day end up in an insane asylum.

[Elelaytet]

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about Marat Safin (like a parent, only I am allowed to do it).

Roger Federer has the best forehand in the biz.

Justine Henin's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, BUT

I am reduced to tears ONLY when watching Martina Hingis play.

Max Mirnyi sure has a wicked serve.

I model my own tennis game after Yuri Sharapov.

David Nalbandian is the best player to never win a Slam--YET. (changed it after I read Moose's - I forgot him!)

My favorite obscure player is Teimuraz Gabashvili, maybe. Is Younes el Aynaoui obscure?

DISLIKES

If you're talking smack about Tatiana Golovin, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Serena Williams (off court), Andy Murray (on court) is the whiniest player on either tour.

Half the WTA has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching Roger Federer play an 18 year-old qualifier.

Rafael Nadal's pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

Jelena Jankovic's forehead bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Tommy Haas, Alexander Waske, and Carlos Moya from about 6 years ago. Can Mario Ancic just sit there and look pretty? He doesn't have to play, but I just couldn't exclude him from the evening


However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw Roger Federer naked.

I would consider going gay/straight for Ana Ivanovic.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting crunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of Dmitry Tursunov, Novak Djokovic, and Nicolas Kiefer. Whereupon, we would proceed to the first part of last question

Jonas Bjorkman, Gustavo Kuerten, Martina Hingis, Fabrice Santoro, Renae Stubbs, Alex Corretja, Goran Ivanisevic, Dmitry Tursunov, Amelie Mauresmo, Marat Safin would make the best conversationalists.

Nicolas Kiefer is the player most likely to end up in prison, while Patty Schnyder may one any day now end up in an insane asylum.

[sbrscnds]

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about Kim Clijsters.

Federer has the best forehand in the biz.

Henin's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

Serena sure has a wicked serve.

I model my own tennis game after ______________.

Jelena Jankovic is the best player to never win a Slam--YET.

My favorite obscure player is Oprandi.

DISLIKES

I've you're talking smack about ______________, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Andy Murray is the whiniest player on either tour.

Ivo Karlovic has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching Maria Sharapova play.

Nadals pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

Nadal bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Andy Roddick, Marat Safin, and Lleyton Hewitt.

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw Rafa Nadal naked.

I would consider going gay/straight for Ana Ivanovic.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting drunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of Marat ('cos he would have the best stories), Kim Clijsters (I'd say she would be great craic), and Andy Roddick (again, a great laugh).

Tim Henman would make the best conversationalist.

Marat Safin is the player most like to end up in prison, while Patty Schnyder may one day end up in an insane asylum.

[SHpuntik]

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about Venus Williams.

Serena Williams has the best forehand in the biz.

Roger Federer's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

Andy Roddick sure has a wicked serve.

I model my own tennis game after Andy Roddick. I like cheap points off big serves and making backhand errors. I'm better at the net than he is, though.

Novak Djokovic is the best player to never win a Slam--YET.

My favorite obscure player is Napaporn Tongsalee.

DISLIKES

I've you're talking smack about Justine Henin, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Andy Murray is the whiniest player on either tour.

Maria Sharapova has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching Lleyton Hewitt play.

Mary Pierce's pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

Anna Chakvetadze bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Frank Dancevic, Amer Delic, and Fillippo Volandri.

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw David Nalbandian naked.

I would consider going straight for Jelena Jankovic.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting crunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of Serena Williams, Bob/Mike Bryan, and Marat Safin.

Kim Clijsters would make the best conversationalist.

Nikolay Davydenko is the player most like to end up in prison, while Jelena Dokic may one day end up in an insane asylum.

[SHpuntik]

LIKES



SESIL KARANTANCHEVA is the player most like to end up in prison.

[BaselBimbooooo]

LIKES

I will cut you if you talk smack about Andy Roddick.

Gonzo has the best forehand in the biz.

Amelie's and El Gato's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

Serena and Andy sure have wicked serves.

I model my own tennis game after Fabrice Santoro (I don't play, but if I did, he'd be the one).

Tim Henman is the best player to never win a Slam.

My favorite obscure player is Simone Bolelli.

DISLIKES

I've you're talking smack about most of the WTA, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Andy Murray is the whiniest player on either tour.

Dr. Ivo has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching Lleyton Hewitt play.

Rafa's pre-serve ritual is irritating and distracting.

Mikhail Youzhny bugs me for no particular reason.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Nicolas Keifer, Michael Russell, Fernando Gonzalez, Nicolas Massu, Feliciano Lopez, David Ferrer, Marat Safin, and Lleyton Hewitt (only to see if the rumors are true).

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw Roger Federer naked.

I would consider going gay/straight for Sania Mirza, Severine Bremond, Gisela Dulko, and Serena Williams.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting drunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of Marat, AndyR, Amelie, Serena, Jose "Puff, Puff, Pass" Acasuso, Mary "Born Again" Pierce (just to see if she'd get drunk.)

Todd Martin would make the best conversationalist.

Alex Bogomolov, Jr. is the player most like to end up in prison, while Guillermo Coria may one day end up in an insane asylum.

[Elelaytet]

Craig, you're right about Henman. The YET stopped me.

I was trying to work him into the survey somehow. He is my favorite ATP player to watch

[BaselBimbooooo]

Craig, you're right about Henman. The YET stopped me.

I was trying to work him into the survey somehow. He is my favorite ATP player to watch

That's why I deleted the YET.

[Gastonleruanich]

Great idea!!!!

LIKES

I will cut you into tiny little bits with a razor blade if you talk smack about Venus Williams.

Richard Gasquet's backhand mechanics are so beautiful, I am reduced to tears when watching them play.

Nicole Vaidisova sure has a wicked out-wide serve. But Ana Ivanovic's all-around serve is awesome and may be the best in the WTA now.

I model my own tennis game after Elizabeth Shue.

Jelena Jankovic and Novak Djokovic are the best players to never win a Slam--YET.

My favorite obscure player is Kveta Hrdlickova Peschke. Please hurry up and get a divorce so we can go back to the sexy Hrdlickova name...

DISLIKES

I've you're talking smack about Mary Carillo or Paulina Rubio, make sure I know about it so I can join in!

Anyone named Andy is the whiniest player on either tour.

Ivo Karlovic has the ugliest game in the known tennis world.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....where I am I? I must have dozed off, as I was watching the Amanda Coetzer/Conchita Martinez Moonball Competition.

Rafael Nadal's pre-serve, buttpicking ritual is irritating and distracting.

Yuri Sharapov bugs me because of his very existence.


LUSTS

If I were playing strip poker with three tennis players of my choice, they would be Serena Williams, Tamira Paszek, and Mary Pierce.

However, I would gouge out my eyes if I saw Justine Henin or Marion Bartoli naked.

I would consider going gay if Mary Carillo was the last woman on Earth.

MISCELLANY

If I were in the club getting drunk with tennis player, my posse would consist of Pat Rafter, Marat Safin, and Dmity Tursunov.

Jelena Jankovic would make the best conversationalist.

Katerina Bohmova is the player most like to end up in prison, while Nicolas Kiefer may one day end up in an insane asylum.

[verybigf]

SESIL KARANTANCHEVA is the player most like to end up in prison.



This is to funny

I loved this thread the minute I saw it but was waiting for others to post.

Foxy

[zooworms]

SESIL KARANTANCHEVA is the player most like to end up in prison.



This is to funny

I loved this thread the minute I saw it but was waiting for others to post.

Foxy

if she isn't allready, Foxy and JT...you know, she hasn't been heard from in a while