[Imiweevierm]

Sister, the fact that you have questioned your-self and are looking into your heart is a clear sign that you are a true believer. You're fear of hell and struggle to understand Islam are also clear signs that your are a believer of a high caliber.

One does not need to understand everything in Islam to be a believer. You just need to know the basics. You understand that there is a God, right? And that He is omnipotent, and that He has sent Prophets and Messengers to us so that we may worship Him only? You understand that after death we will be resurrected right? And that our actions here will decided our fate in the hereafter? If you understand all this, then you are a true believer. You don't need to go into the nitty gritty stuff, thats what scholars are for.

ps: Brother Adil Faiyaz explained qadr pretty good. Thats all there is too it, nothing too technical, right?