[Vikonbarius]

Toni....I'll see your 15 "post" years and raise you by 8 more...lol... I could've raised you an additional year...but my menopausal trip sort of got interrupted midway through by a totally unexpected pregnacy...(he's now 23)

ChaCha....I can't say as I've noticed any difference due to being post-
menopausal...maybe I'm just one of the lucky ones? I lost 65 pounds the first time I tried this WOE...but like you I got sidetracked by life and forgot to focus on myself...so ended up gaining it all back...plus some..
I think the difference, this time...is that I've finally come to terms with the fact that this is NOT A DIET...I cannot stay on it only long enough to lose the weight and then go back to the way I ate before...This is now, for me, A LIFETIME COMMITMENT..Being able to come here and vent...gain insight....and encouragement from everyone...makes the day to day
journey easier...So keep on posting...We'll be here for you...

Lynn

p.s. I'm seriously pushing 69...so it's not too late for your mom either..

[geraint.faughn]

Merlot, THANKS for the encouragement! (I'm really trying!!)

Lynn, perhaps now that my system has had a chance to adapt (and the fact that I REFUSE to live the rest of my life with NO energy and toting all that extra weight), I'll make progress. I lost it before with this WOL, and I'll do it again for the last time--I hope those aren't my famous last words! I'm gonna give it the old college try, though! Thanks for YOUR encouragement, too!

As far as my mother is concerned, it's a sad case. She's been overweight most of my life (with the exception of the occasional successful diet she's tried), and she used to knock Atkins until she saw me drop all the weight I did last time. (I actually found the book at her house once...HA!) Honestly, I believe she's stuck on WW, even though she hasn't lost anything in years. She goes to the meetings religiously, pays her membership dues, but hasn't lost in a LONG time. Personally, I think her willpower is nonexistent at this point, and she's resolved to live the rest of her life overweight, unfortunately. It's gotten to the point that, when I go visit her, she purposely serves foods that she knows I can't/won't eat. She tells me that I'll never get the weight off--"Just look at me"--and it seems that she does her best to sabotage my efforts. I have since learned that, if we'll be eating with her, I should just eat before going, sometimes even packing snacks and additional food. (I sit at the table and watch them eat.) I've actually tried to get her started on Atkins, but she cannot comprehend the idea of "one bite won't hurt". She makes excuses: "I HAVE to have my fruit everyday." "But this popcorn is lowfat!" I know she WANTS to lose the weight--I just think she's tired of trying.

ChaCha

[mobiphones]

Hey Cha - that must be so hard. but please try to just do this one for you - it is sooo tempting i know to try and get someone else who needs help, the help they need, but you can't do it for her. you just get yourself healthy and happy, and maintaining - THEN worry about mom - if she'll let you that is! good for you for "watching them eat" - that must suck, but this is for you and your health,s o you're doing the right thing

well done on yoru progress so far - you are smokin!

t

[Susanleech]

ChaCha,

Comments like your Mom makes are probably a "defense" mechanism ("She tells me that I'll never get the weight off--"Just look at me") By saying this she is blaming it on genetics or metabolism, not on the choices she makes. Pulling YOU into this validates this denial.

I think when you eat with her, you can say, "Mom, just fix enough for you...I'll bring my low-carb over so you don't have to fuss. It's your company I want."

Atkins is not everyone's cup of tea. My daughter was miserable when she tried it as the food choices were not to her liking. She, instead, went the heavy exercise route (personal trainer at the gym) with more a WW diet. It works for her. Maybe your success will encourage her to take her WW more seriously.

Hope for the best...

Toni

[Susanleech]

ChaCha,

Comments like your Mom makes are probably a "defense" mechanism ("She tells me that I'll never get the weight off--"Just look at me") By saying this she is blaming it on genetics or metabolism, not on the choices she makes. Pulling YOU into this validates this denial.

I think when you eat with her, you can say, "Mom, just fix enough for you...I'll bring my low-carb over so you don't have to fuss. It's your company I want."

Atkins is not everyone's cup of tea. My daughter was miserable when she tried it as the food choices were not to her liking. She, instead, went the heavy exercise route (personal trainer at the gym) with more a WW diet. It works for her. Maybe your success will encourage her to take her WW more seriously.

Hope for the best...

Toni

[geraint.faughn]

My sincerest thanks for all the wonderful words of praise and encouragement! I happen to be quite a stubborn/OCD person, so once I make up my mind about something (like this WOL), it's hard to dissuade me. Fortunately, I live an hour away from Mom, and my dear hubby is quite the cheerleader for me! I'm DEFINITELY doing this for ME!

We've all known that Mom has "issues"--she likes to blame everything else for her weight issues without accepting responsibility for them. Yet, everyday, she and Dad eat lunch at the local greasy spoon: blueplate special, no less.

I have to consider the old adage "misery loves company" when it comes to my mother and her weight issues. I know that she loves me and she wants the best for me, but she's passive/aggressive as well. For example, my birthday is in April. She and Dad will want to get together (which I have no problem with), but she'll show up with a birthday cake! (Even after I tell her I don't want one!)

I'm doing THIS is for ME. My hopes are that I can be a positive influence on her.

Thanks for the continued support! Y'all know how to give a gal a boost!

ChaCha

[Vikonbarius]

ChaCha,
It took me the longest time to realize that IF I were going to succeed I had to do this just for me...the thing that they tell you on airplanes about the oxygen mask really does apply here...( you know...put your own mask on first, etc)..
Hopefully Toni is right and seeing your success will motivate your mom into taking her WW seriously...the important thing is that you have your husband's support...and all of us here to also cheer you on...YOU CAN DO THIS...like the rest of us...one step at a time....so you go girl....

Lynn

[Vikonbarius]

ChaCha,
It took me the longest time to realize that IF I were going to succeed I had to do this just for me...the thing that they tell you on airplanes about the oxygen mask really does apply here...( you know...put your own mask on first, etc)..
Hopefully Toni is right and seeing your success will motivate your mom into taking her WW seriously...the important thing is that you have your husband's support...and all of us here to also cheer you on...YOU CAN DO THIS...like the rest of us...one step at a time....so you go girl....

Lynn

[Ilaubuas]

Cha Cha( I love the name by the way) I just wanted to say keep up the good work and just take one day at a time. Try hard to focus what the Good Lord has given you from the inside because fat or thin that is always how I have tried to look at things. If you are down it might be that someone has made you feel that way with their mouth. Although I think you feel much better on Atkins and taking care of yourself for yourself. I am sort of new myself ;month two and I have had my ups and downs. Even gained weight when I did nothing wrong and then suddenly lost that weight and more, or don't lose weight and lost inches. What part of the Deep south are you from? If you don't mind me asking? My family from my dads side is all from North Carolina, Georgia, and Tenn.

Snicks

[geraint.faughn]

Sorry to be so late getting back to this thread--been reading all OVER the place!

Lynn and Toni, I hesitated to post this because I fear others will think that I resent my mother. The truth is that my weight loss in the past has driven a wedge between us. I love my mother whole-heartedly, but someone who doesn't know her may take this the wrong way. What my mother will PROBABLY do will be to quietly observe then secretly research my progress. (That's what she did last time.) I'll have to wait until she says something first. Otherwise, she takes it as criticism and gloating. It's OBVIOUSLY a very sensitive issue to her, as it is to most of us. The last time I was successful and she asked about it, her immediate response was, "Well, I MUST have my ____ and ____ each day. Atkins isn't for me." She also loathes exercising. I can honestly say that I have NEVER IN MY LIFE seen her "officially" exercise. I've seen her SWEAT doing chores, but not officially work out. She's in her 70's, so I don't expect her to do aerobics, but she could WALK! She has a maid to clean the house, likes to stroll through Wal-Mart, watch TV, visit socially, and take short road trips with Dad. (Dad, BTW, walks everyday.) I feel sorry for her, but I think she's given up. I WANT to help her, but she has to want to help herself first. I haven't given up on her--I just know SHE has to make the decision to help herself. (I can't do it for her, and she can't do it for me.)

Snicks, I couldn't agree more with you: I feel TONS better on Atkins. And I'm expecting the ups and down--just not looking forward to them, you know? I just have to take this one day at a time. Gotta put our noses to the grind stone! (Thanks for the thumbs-up on the name!)

I'm in Mississippi.

[Susanleech]

ChaCha,

Not for a minute did I think you resented your mom. You were just stating the "way it is and has been." I think you understand your mom quite well, so as long as you can understand "This is just her way..." and not take it personally, sounds like you won't let this undermine your success.

And "Reading all over the place" is SO GOOD! Hope it keeps up the motivation!

My best...

Toni

[geraint.faughn]

Happy New Year, everyone! I just wanted to take this opportunity to introduce myself.

I'm 38 yo and familiar with the Atkins WOL, as I lost about 50 lbs on it 9 years ago. However, since my family and I relocated to a rural area (plain-jane/bare necessities grocery store) and an emergency hysterectomy 6 years ago, I've unwillingly packed the weight back on. I've tried returning to Atkins, to no avail (which surprised me) and then moved on to WW, the Cabbage Soup Diet, MINIMAL calories, etc...NOTHING WORKS! This time, I plan to try Atkins again and seriously work out.

I'm heavier than I've ever been in my life at 200 lbs, and I hate what it's done to my usually care-free spirit. My self-image has hit rock bottom. Until now, I have found myself throwing myself into my work and children rather than focus on my own issues. I realize I have only myself to blame, but I look at my 70+ yo mother and say, "That's gonna be me in a few years." (She's shorter than I, but heavier.)

The GOOD news is that I have a loving support system at home. My husband has offered to help, my daughter and son want to work out with me (ages 15 and 9, respectively) I have refused to purchase new clothing until I get this weight off. I've even decided to pay myself each time I work out so that I'll have $$ to buy new clothing when I get to that point--and I'll get there (eventually)! Joined a gym already! Starting to work out there on Monday.

I wanted to ask you other post-menopausal women on this WOL what tricks you had to make Atkins work better for you. It seems that Atkins, which actually HELPED my hypoglycemia, no longer works for me now (with regards to weight loss). It just seems that, since I'm not taking HRT but I have NO hormonal activity, NOTHING works for me. (That's why I've returned to Atkins.)

Thank you in advance for your help. I know that, with all the valuable information available at my fingertips here, I'll get there.

Anyone have any ideas out there for me? Praying for a miracle...

ChaCha

[Susanleech]

ChaCha...

I am SO post-menopausal I may have forgotten about it...15 years.

But in 2009 I have lost 30 pounds and will lose the last 10 pounds this year! Take it slow and sure...allow yourself time. Take the time to develop a plan you can live with FOREVER. I gave up speed of loss for satisfaction with the plan. Why eat what you do not want? It takes some time to try things out. And I LOVE the plan now! I can stay on it forever.

Find that old cloth tape measure (or buy one) and take, write down, and make a chart of your vital stats...everything including wrist, bicep relaxed and pumped up, knee, wrist, ankle, etc...as well as bust, waist, abdomen, hips, thigh...etc. Every Saturday, measure. You will be SO MOTIVATED when you stall on the scales, you still shrink IF you DO NOT CHEAT!

My best to you...YOU can do it!

Toni

[geraint.faughn]

Thanks for your response, Toni! It's nice to know there's others out there that do/have struggled with weight issues! (I thought that I was the only one--except my mother!)

Today has progressed nicely, and it's only Day 2! I had my morning cup of coffee with a little heavy cream. I enjoyed bacon and eggs for breakfast, then cooked a lunch for us all of roast, green beans, and rice (I had NO rice) and gravy (just the meat juices--no thickener or additives). For dinner, I'm fixing a nice oxtail stew, small steaks, turnip/mustard greens, and salad. (FINALLY got to the grocery store today, so I can have salads now! YAY!) Of course, I've drunk water, water, and MORE water--no other caffeine other than my morning cup of coffee.

Fortunately, I'm on no HRT, no blood pressure meds, no pills other than my supplements (vitamins). My husband couldn't believe that I lost 4.5 lbs in water overnight! MAYBE, just MAYBE, if I bite the bullet and get that continued support from home (and HERE ), I can do this! I actually see a flicker of light at the end of the tunnel!

BTW, workouts start tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Thanks again, Toni. I really needed to hear from someone who understands. As far as the time it'll take to lose the weight, I've got nothing BUT time!

ChaCha

[Susanleech]

ChaCha...

You will be a great success at this. Have you used a tape measure and taken the vital stats and written them down on a little chart, so you can see your awesome progress weekly? If not please do!

When you stall, and we ALL do eventually, the loss of inches PROVES things are going our way!

My best to you...good luck and keep posting, please!

Toni

[geraint.faughn]

Merlot,

So far, so great! In 8 days, I've lost 8.5 lbs and my CLOTHES are looser already!! I'm just plugging right along!

Hope you're doing well! We'll get there! I just KNOW it!

ChaCha

[Susanleech]

8.5 pounds?

TREMENDIOUS!

I just "knew" you would do it!

Keep it up!! Post often!

Toni